Monday, August 25, 2014

Old-Fashioned Curse Words Of The Day

I must find a way to work these into my everyday cusserations. Link from Sharon Cline.
From Mental Floss:
"Taboos against what we would today consider pretty mild exclamations like "damn!" "hell!" and "Jesus Christ!" led the swearers of years past to come up with creative substitutions that gave them some measure of emotional release while keeping within the bounds of propriety. These substitutions are called "minced oaths," and they've left their mark on our vocabulary.
Gosh, gee, golly, dagnamit, darn, drat, gadzooks, zounds, heck, and cripes are all minced oaths that are still around to charm us with their innocent old-timey ring. But there are others you may not have heard of."

CONSARN!

A substitute for "goddamn." From an 1854 Dictionary of Northamptonshire words: "Consarn you! If you don't mind what you're about I'll give it to you!" Slow down and hit both syllables equally hard, and it's like squeezing a stress ball.

BEJABBERS!

A substitute for "by Jesus!" that is similar to "bejesus!" but jabbier. An Irish import, along the lines of "faith and begorrah!" Especially good for toe-stubbing.

GREAT HORN SPOON!

Something you can swear by, used in a way similar to "by God!" It seems to have come from seafaring slang, and might refer to the Big Dipper.

GOSH-ALL POTOMAC!

This one goes along with the rest of the "gosh all" family: goshamighty, gosh-all-hemlock, gosh all fish-hooks, etc. "Gosh all Potomac" is the earliest one attested in the Dictionary of American English on Historical Principles, and it's about time we brought it back.

BY THE DOUBLE-BARRELED JUMPING JIMINETTY!

It's too bad the tradition of productive, long "by the" swears has fallen out of fashion. You could load enough crazy-sounding nonsense on there to really scare your kids into cleaning their rooms.

G. ROVER CRIPES!

One of the minced oaths that approximate the sounds in "Jesus Christ!" it uses all the strategies found elsewhere: the "gee" sound (Gee! Jeepers! Jeez!), the middle name (Jesus H. Particular Christ!), and the "cr" sound (Crikey! Criminy! Cracky! Christmas!).

THUNDERATION!

A substitute for "damnation," similar to "tarnation" and "botheration." WTF is so tired. Try "What in thunderation?" instead.


(more here)

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Gene Simmons KISS Chair

best of craigslist > st louis >

Gene Simmons KISS chair

This chair was made for an art class in college. Has seen a few years in a basement but if someone wants it, it's yours or if not, it's the garbage's.

Features:

- Chest hair made out of moss
- 3D carved Styrofoam tongue
- Real boots


News: Parents Call Cops On Sexting Daughter

They must like attorney fees. Just take the phone away, people.
Parents Turn In 13-Year-Old Daughter To Cops Over Nude Pics On Cell Phone

DINWIDDIE COUNTY, Va. — A Dinwiddie mother got a nasty shock when she went through her daughter’s cell phone and tablet. The pictures she discovered were so disturbing that she turned the girl in to sheriff’s deputies.

The parents discovered their 13-year-old daughter, who is about to enter the eighth-grade, had been sending and receiving naked pictures of other teens using her tablet.

And the deeper they dug, the worse it got. In fact, things got so bad they called in the sheriff’s department to investigate.

“What scares me is, this is much bigger than we realize. How many others are doing this and you don’t realize it,” asked the Dinwiddie County mother of two.

(read more)

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