Friday, March 7, 2014

Assorted Kenny Kreations Of The Day

So I'm getting the impression that Kenny Rogers is a popular guy among... somebody. I don't get it. And I'm from the South, where most of this shit was no doubt kreated.

Kenny jacket. A must-have. Look at that Kenny stare. No one will dare sneak up on you.

Kenny on velvet. Post-stroke.

Kenny serving bowl. Holds two full cups of suck. Or Chex Mix.

Kenny poker game with chickens instead of dogs. You got to know when to bluff 'em, know when to stuff 'em, know when to fry 'em deep, and know when to broil.

Kenny coffee tumbler. Love will turn you around. If not, have more coffee.

Kenny (?) drawring -- the Bloated Years.

Kenny notebook/journal/sketchpad. "Dear Diary, why does Grandma keep buying me shit from Goodwill?"

Easy opening for that denim jacket or tailgating tent! They also make great nipple tassels!

Kenny greeting card. "Don't be afraid to give up the good and hire an art student to save money."

"Kenny As The Gambler" cufflinks. Perfect for that black-tie affair or poker night.

Fat Kenny on velvet

Kenny guitar. Play it right -- Kenny's watching.

Kenny painting. Not sure if it's velvet, but Kenny's jacket is.

Kenny t-shirt, modeled by someone who called his 1-900 sex line.


  1. Oh, the captions! I lost it at "Dear Diary, why does Grandma keep buying me shit from Goodwill?" HAHAHAHA! Those nipple tassels look, um, heavy. :)

  2. The Kenny poker game with chickens--wut? Hahaha! I don't know what the people who created all of these were thinking but bless their hearts. =) Great captions, Cary.

  3. Second from the bottom, Kenny painting - the face doesn't fit the head. It looks like one of those stand up photo boards where you stick your face in the oval hole and someone takes your picture.

  4. Some of these could easily be Wilford Brimley. Especially the "Fat Kenny on Velvet" =DIABEETUS.

  5. I can't help but think that the art on the guitar is a little off in Kenny's eyebrows area.



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