None of these should surprise you, but it never hurts to be sure. I like helping, you see. I have a servant's heart. That's why I'm giving you an alternative after each word to use if you still are uncomfortable pronouncing the word in question.
From Mental Floss.
Pen names don't always make things easier. Theodore Geisel's college buddy Alexander Liang made a rhyme to teach you the right way to pronounce it:
"You’re wrong as the deuce
And you shouldn’t rejoice
If you’re calling him Seuss
He pronounces it Soice" (or Zoice).
Alternative: "The dude who wrote Cat In The Hat."
Let's put the kibosh, pronounced "KY-bosh," on saying this word like "kuh-BOSH."
Alternative: "Nip it."
An initial hard (k) sound is the standard, but linguists say the (s) sound emerged as far back as the 17th century. Still, you'll sound ridiculous (but correct!) if you bring that hard (k) to a Boston Celtics basketball game.
This word sounds just like "controller." If you're tempted to pronounce that silent (pt), please comptroll yourself!
Maybe it's because it's one letter short of "cachet." Maybe it's just more fun to mispronounce. This words sounds just like "cash."
This word meaning "deception by trickery" is aptly tricky to pronounce. The beginning (ch) sound is "sh," as in "Chicago." The French pronounce the word "shih-connery," which makes it easy to remember the definition. However, Americans love a long (a) and tend to pronounce it "shih-cane-a-ree." Choose your own adventure.
You'll be the butt of the joke if you pronounce this "BAY-nul." It's "buh-NAHL."
If pronouncing it "a-FLU-ent" is wrong, some people don't want to be right. The stress on this word is supposed to be on the first syllable—"AFF-lu-ent." But stressing the second syllable became so mainstream that dictionaries started validating the pronunciation in the 1980s.
Pronunciation quirks and mistakes happen when people try to read and speak by the rules. Too bad the English language doesn't always make sense. The past tense of "forbid" was originally supposed to be spelled and pronounced "for-bad." But then people started spelling it "forbade" and rhyming it with "made." Now linguists say the word sounds archaic any way you say it. Most people use "forbid" as a past or present-tense verb.
Alternative: "Told ____ not to do that shit."
Okay, so maybe this word's not that commonly used. But now that you know it's pronounced "bo-sun," you might find more reasons to work it into conversation.
Alternative: (Not necessary. You will never use this word.)
When this word was borrowed from French in the 17th century, it was quickly Anglicized to rhyme with "itch." But in the 20th century, more people embraced a true French pronunciation and decided to pronounce it "neesh." Both are correct.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
My favorites from last year.
Bat Boy lives!
Settle down, Chicken Man
We called these "waterheads" when I was a kid.
I bet you can't do that anymore.
I bet you can't do that anymore.
Unfrozen caveman punching bag
It's okay, brah, I'm here for you.
It was Injun Joe! He done it!
That's the hairiest chick I've ever seen.
Jesus Christ! Who farted?
She farted. Get ready, here comes another one.
WTF is that?
Shit got real up in here.
HEY! Tell that cop he can KISS. MY. ASS!
Tell 'em Large Marge sent ya!
He doesn't have to worry about flossing. Not that he ever did.
They call in Wayne Brady for the troublemakers.
AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR DAT!