Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Pop Culture References I Have To Stop Using Because Nobody Under 35 Gets My Goddamn Jokes Anymore

Getting old sucks.

My pop-culture references that meet with blank stares from people who think MTV was the first TV channel.

The Honeycomb Hideout


Archie & Edith

Foster Brooks
Evel Kneivel

"Real cola taste, just one calorie, TAB!"

"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!"

Battle of the Network Stars

Robert Conrad losing his temper on Battle of the Network Stars

Lynda Carter's nipples on Battle of the Network Stars

"Pret-ty sneaky, sis."

Pickin' & grinnin'

"An-a one, an-a two..."

8-tracks & 45s

Billie Jo McAllister

Airplane '79

"The world's a big blue marble when you see it from out there...."
Bubble-gum cigarettes

Stretch Armstrong


Koogle flavored peanut butter

"Sit on it"

The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia

The crying Indian (nobody said "native American" back then) in the pollution PSA

A CBS special presentation
Checkers, the First Dog

"They work for me. My name is Charlie."

Three-Mile Island


"Good night, John Boy"

D. B. Cooper


"Hey Mikey! He likes it!"

"Who wears short shorts? We wear short shorts!"

Roots/Kunta Kinte/Chicken George

ABC Afterschool Special


"Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too?" 

The Jackson Five and The Osmonds

"They call me Yuk-Mouth, 'cuz I don't brush. How's about a little kiss?"

Mrs. Ha-Wiggins
"Hooray! I'm for the udder team."

Steve McGarrett, Dano, Chin Ho, Wo Fat



The Child Catcher (shudder)

The JC Penney catalog with the guy's weiner showing on the men's underwear page

Sgt. Stedanko

The Munich Olympics

The DeFranco family - "Heartbeat, It's a Love Beat"

"Up ya nose with a rubber hose!"

"I was just standin' over here by the tomatoes, and here he come, right out of the pole beans, nekkid as a jaybird!"


"Your Windsong stays on my mind." 

Bigfoot vs. the Six Million Dollar Man

Scut Farkas and his little toadie, Grover Dill

"We're gonna zoom zoom zoom-a zoom..."

"I hanker for a hunk of, a slice a slab a chunk of, I hanker for a hunk of cheese."

Col. Potter, Hawkeye, Trapper John, Radar, Klinger & Hot Lips 

I could do this all day...


  1. God, how I remember all these. Since everyone I work with is under age 25, nearly everything I say gets a blank stare, usually followed by them impatiently reminding me, "I wasn't even BORN yet!"

  2. My kids will now pretend to get my references because for years I would find youtube videos or websites that explained them and then make the kids watch. Now they just laugh and go, "Yeah, hahaha! Good one, Mom!" Courtesy laughs. That's what I get these days. :)

    Great list, C!

    1. That is too funny. I am forever pulling up YouTube and making my kids watch some dumb commercial. So far they are still indulging me.

  3. OMG! So good. Shake n' Bake.. "AND WE HAYULPED!" I still say that shit.

  4. ancient Chinese secret hmmmmm?

  5. I'm under 35 and I get most of these ;) however, I'm one of the few in my generation who realize that there was some pretty cool shit that happened before I was born lol.

  6. I think I'm the opposite - I understand references that are before my time, but if you make a reference to some modern TV show for example, I may not get it.

    The other day someone asked me my age and I told him I was Jack Benny's age (39). He didn't get it. And he's close to my age. But then I dunno which is worse - him not getting the reference or me using that reference in the first place.

    1. Him not getting it. That was a brilliant use of a classic reference. A pearl before swine, in this case.

  7. I'm right there with you. I remember all but about three on this list. Great post, Cary!

    "How many licks to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

    "A little dab'll do you."

    Watching the "Wizard of Oz" every year.

    "Hey, let's get Mikey! He won't eat it. He hates everything."

  8. Love these, never let them die!

    And BTW, I have an earworm now...."oh yes they call him The Streak...boogety boogety...fastest thing on two feet"

  9. One we've used around work a lot recently is "Manly, yes, but I like it too!"

  10. I've noticed the "Mr. Owl" Tootsie Pop commercial is *still* being shown on Cartoon Network.

    But, alas, I have never seen Battle of the Network Stars, for some reason, my family never bothered. We skipped most of those "very special episode" episodes too.

  11. You can try hard...or you can try soft...LOVE'S BABY SOFT...

    Don't Be a Draggin' Lady! (that was always one of my favourites!)

    De Plane, De Plane!

    1. So many memorable scent commercials from the 70s: Love's Baby Soft, Windsong, Charlie, Enjoli ("I can bring home the bacon/Fry it up in a pan...").

      I don't remember the Dragon Lady. Gotta look that one up.

  12. Do you remember Jot?

    1. Looks vaguely familiar. Must have been one of those Sunday morning B-team cartoons, like Goliath & Davey or Speed Racer.

  13. Those were beautiful, brought back a few sublime memories, and coming from a born in 1969 chick, despair not. There are lots of us.

  14. These are awesome, this "born in 1969" lady knows almost every one. Don't despair, so many of us remember it all......I used the CBS Special blast as a ringtone before, and it freaks the occasional person out...."What is that??? I know that, what IS THAT?" LOL.



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