Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Misheard Lyrics Of The Day

Another one from the archives.

Some selections from The Archive Of Misheard Lyrics (KissThisGuy.com), a site that invites readers to send in their misheard lyrics and any amusing details about the error. The URL is based on the frequently misheard lyrics of Jimi Hendrix's Purple Haze: "'scuse me, while I kiss the sky."

Here are 21 of my favorites.


 
Song: Addicted To Love by Robert Palmer 
Misheard Lyric: Might as well face it, you're a dick with a glove 
Correct Lyric: Might as well face it, you're addicted to love

Song: Centerfold by J Geils Band
Misheard Lyric: My anus is the center hole
Correct Lyric: My angel is a centerfold

Song: Losing My Religion by R.E.M. 
Misheard Lyric: Let's pee in the corner, let's pee in the spotlight... 
Correct Lyric: That's me in the corner, that's me in the spotlight... 

Song: Bohemian Rhapsody 
Misheard Lyric: The algebra has a devil for a sidekick, heeeee... 
Correct Lyric: Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me... 

Song: Summer Of '69 by Bryan Adams 
Misheard Lyric: Got my first real sex dream, I was five at the time, played it till my fingers bled, was the summer of '69 
Correct Lyric: Got my first real six-string, bought it at the five-and-dime, played it till my fingers bled, was the summer of '69 

Song: Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana 
Misheard Lyric: Here we are now, in containers... 
Correct Lyric: Here we are now, entertain us... 

Song: Blinded By The Light by Manfred Mann 
Misheard Lyric: Wrapped up like a douche, another rumor in the night 
Correct Lyric: Revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night  

Song: Livin' On A Prayer by Bon Jovi
Misheard Lyric: You got to hold on to what you got, it doesn't make a difference if we're naked or not 
Correct Lyric: You got to hold on to what you got, it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not  

Song: Gettin' Jiggy With It by Will Smith 
Misheard Lyric: Kick a chicken with it 
Correct Lyric: Gettin' jiggy with it  

Song: Blowin' In The Wind by Bob Dylan 
Misheard Lyric: The ants are my friends, they're blowin' in the wind, the ants are a-blowin' in the wind  
Correct Lyric: The answer, my friends, is blowin' in the wind, the answer is blowin' in the wind

Song: Mysterious Ways by U2  
Misheard Lyric: Shamu, the mysterious whale  
Correct Lyric: She moves in mysterious ways


 
Song: Ghostbusters by Ray Parker, Jr. 
Misheard Lyric: Who ya gonna call? Those bastards! 
Correct Lyric: Who ya gonna call? Ghostbusters! 

Song: Take Me Home, Country Roads by John Denver 
Misheard Lyric: West Virginia, mount yer momma 
Correct Lyric: West Virginia, mountain momma 

Song: Addicted To Love by Robert Palmer 
Misheard Lyric: Might as well face it, you're a dickhead in love 
Correct Lyric: Might as well face it, you're addicted to love
 

Song: Desperado by The Eagles 
Misheard Lyric: You've been downright offensive for so long now 
Correct Lyric: You've been out riding fences for so long now 

Song: Closer by Nine Inch Nails 
Misheard Lyric: I want a duck shaped like a triangle, you give a toaster to Bob 
Correct Lyric: I want to fuck you like an animal, you get me closer to God 

Song: We Build This City by Starship 
Misheard Lyric: We built this city on the wrong damn road 
Correct Lyric: We built this city on rock and roll
 

Song: My Hero by Foo Fighters 
Misheard Lyric: There goes my hero, he's old and hairy 
Correct Lyric: There goes my hero, he's ordinary 

Song: Can't Stop by Red Hot Chili Peppers 
Misheard Lyric: Can't stop the ferrets when they need foodCorrect Lyric: Can't stop the spirits when they need you
 

Song: Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap by AC/DC 
Misheard Lyric: Dirty deeds and they're done with sheep 
Correct Lyric: Dirty deeds and they're done dirt cheap 

Song: Like A Virgin by Madonna 
Misheard Lyric: Like a virgin, touched for the thirty-first time 
Correct Lyric: Like a virgin, touched for the very first time 

Song: Michelle by The Beatles 
Misheard Lyric: Michelle, Ma Bell, some say monkeys play piano well, play piano well 
Correct Lyric: Michelle ma belle, sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble, très bien ensemble.

12 comments:

  1. my mother in law always thought Dirty Deeds went "Dirty Knees and the Jungle chief"

    ReplyDelete
  2. My husband swore for years that Dirty Deeds went "Dirty deeds and they're thunder cheese."

    ReplyDelete
  3. I hate it when ants blow in the wind. :D

    Great list!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I had a friend and work who would always sing "scream my balls off" when No Doubt Spiderwebs was on the radio. The correct lyric was "screen my phone calls". He also sang "Mr. Big Stuff of Love (say what?) to RHCPs "Rollercoaster" - I should never have quit that job!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Mount yer momma. That's awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  6. My youngest sang, "I've got shoes, they're made of plywood, and I'm losing the bows" from Grease.

    My brother sang Freddie Fender's classic "Wave to Dave and wave to Mike!"

    And I used to sing "She's got electric boobs, her mom has 2 . . ."

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ever since our boss let us bring in MP3 players to listen at work I've been keeping records of my coworker's creative singing. These are the two best:

    MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE - SING

    Misheard lyrics: Sing it for the boys, sing it for the girls Every time that you lose it, sing it for the world Sing it from the heart, sing it to your nuts.

    Real lyrics: Sing it for the boys, sing it for the girls Every time that you lose it, sing it for the world Sing it from the heart, sing it 'til you're nuts.

    YOUNG THE GIANT - Cough Syrup

    Misheard lyrics: Life's too short to eat a carrot oh.

    Real lyrics: Life's too short to even care at all oh.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You will NEVER convince me that Manfred Mann is not saying douche. Never. I've listened to that song a thousand times and it still sounds like douche. Every. Single. Time.

    And how the hell do you mishear Nine Inch Nails as "I want a duck shaped like a triangle, you give a toaster to Bob"?!? Is that the Raffi version?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Daughter used to sing Kenny Loggins "Don't Fight It" as "Go Pirate".

    ReplyDelete
  10. My sister used to sing "Hang On Sloopy" as "Hang On Stupid." What kind of name is Sloopy anyway?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Years ago, when Kenny Rogers was still human, the kids of a co-worker of mine thought that Kenny was singing, "You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille, four hungry children, a-crapping in the field"......." Real lyrics: four hungry children, a crop in the field. I now picture 4 children crapping in a corn field if I hear that song.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kinda makes it hard to enjoy corn on the cob.

      Although if you grew up near farms like I did and you know what the older kids did in the cornfields, a little poo is nothing.

      Delete

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