Monday, June 11, 2012

News: Man Stabs Friend During Argument Over Who Can Have More Sex

I bet he's having the most sex now. In jail. 

From The Smoking Gun.

Man Stabbed Friend During Argument Over Who Has The Most Sex, Police Report

An argument between two South Carolina men over which one of them “can have the most sex” ended Sunday with a stabbing, police report.

Calvin Bernard Hill, 54, was arrested on a felony battery charge following an altercation in the back of a PT Cruiser being driven by a female acquaintance of the duo. 

According to a Greenwood City Police Department report, Hill stabbed the 41-year-old victim in the ribs after they left a party.

Interviewed at the hospital, the victim--whose name was redacted from the police report--said that “he and Mr. Hill got into a verbal altercation about who can have the most sex.” 

A “tussling match” ensued and he ended up being stabbed, recalled the victim, who was initially found bleeding profusely by a cop identified as “Captain Morgan.”

The driver told police that Hill threw a knife away after the incident and stated, "I can’t go down for this.” When questioned by a cop, Hill denied stabbing the victim, claiming “that man stabbed his self.”

Pictured in the above mug shot, Hill is being held in the Greenwood County Detention Center in lieu of $10,000 bond.


  1. "Captain Morgan"--Ha! I bet that cop gets grief over his name a lot. :)

    This is such a worthwhile subject to have an argument about, especially since it landed one of them in the hospital and one of them in jail. I wonder how they were going to prove which one was right. They are probably both just big talkers and neither one was getting any.

  2. Whoever owns a PT Cruiser is getting the least amount of nookie. The mere mention of it made my vagina dry up like kitty litter.

  3. Are you sure this isn't from The Onion? I can guarantee that thanks to Mr. Hill's wonky left eye, lack of intelligence, and association with PT Cruisers and anyone who would drive one (notice I didn't say "buy"), he needs to just give it up and start wearing those shoes with Velcro closures. I think he's probably wearing flip flops in his new home, though. Thanks for the laugh, Cary!



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