Monday, November 21, 2011

Chart Of The Day: Morgan Freeman

From Buzzfeed and Lisa L.


"How To" Vid Of The Day: Scarving

Listen to Susan. She's a career woman. I like this scarf video a lot better than the one I ran on my Facebook page last week.


News Of The Day: Butt Injection With "Fix A Flat" Leads To Arrest

I dunno, it was worth a shot. From Keith, Jenn and MSNBC.



Butt Injection With 'Fix A Flat' Leads to Arrest

by Brian Hamacher • Nov. 21, 2011

A Miami Gardens transgender woman is facing charges of practicing medicine without a license after police say she injected a patient's rear with everything but the kitchen sink in an illegal cosmetic surgery procedure.

Oneal Ron Morris, 30, was arrested Friday after an investigation by Miami Gardens Police and the Florida Department of Health.

According to police, the victim saw Morris in May and was injected in her buttocks with a substance consisting of cement, "Fix a Flat," mineral oil and super glue.

The amateur incision was then sealed with super glue, police said. The victim was later hospitalized with a serious medical condition as a result of the injections.

Morris, who police say is a man but appears to look like a woman and sports an apparently enhanced rear herself in arrest photos, was being held on $7,500 bond. It was unknown whether she has an attorney.

Police believe there may be other victims of Morris who may be afraid to come forward. They said the victims haven't done anything illegal and shouldn't be afraid to come forward.

Anyone with information is asked to call Miami Gardens Police at 305-474-1420.


Vid Of The Day: Granny Kicks Call Of Duty A** (NSFW!)

"This is a game for pussies!" Video is NSFW.


25 Yiddish Words You Should Know

You'll know most of these words, but maybe not their literal meanings or proper spellings. From DailyWritingTips.com.



bupkes
Not a word for polite company. Bubkes or bobkes may be related to the Polish word for beans, but it really means “goat droppings” or “horse droppings.” It’s often used by American Jews for trivial, worthless, a ridiculously small amount. “After all the work I did, I got bupkes!”

chutzpah
Nerve or extreme arrogance. In English, chutzpah often
connotes courage or confidence, but among Yiddish speakers, it is not a compliment.

feh!
An expression of disgust or disapproval, representative of the sound of spitting.

goy
A non-Jew, a Gentile. As in Hebrew, one Gentile is a goy, many Gentiles are goyim, the non-Jewish world in general is “the goyim.” Goyish is the adjective form. Putting mayonnaise on a pastrami sandwich is goyish. Putting mayonnaise on a pastrami sandwich on white bread is even more goyish.

kvetsh
In popular English, kvetch means “complain, whine or fret,” but in Yiddish, kvetsh literally means “to press or squeeze,” like a wrong-sized shoe. But it’s also used on Yiddish web pages for “click here."

maven
An expert, often used sarcastically.

Mazel Tov
Literally “good luck,” (well, literally, “good constellation”) but it’s a congratulation for what just happened, not a hopeful wish for what might happen in the future. When someone gets married or has a child or graduates from college, this is what you say to them.


mentsh (or mensch)
An honorable, decent person, an authentic person, a person who helps you when you need help. Can be a man, woman or child.

mishegas
Insanity or craziness. A meshugener is a crazy man. If you want to insult someone, you can ask them, ”Does it hurt to be crazy?”

mishpocheh
It means family, as in “Relax, you’re mishpocheh. I’ll sell it to you at wholesale.”

nosh
To nibble; a light snack, but you won’t be light if you don’t stop noshing.

oy vey
Exclamation of dismay, grief, or exasperation. The phrase oy vey iz mir means “Oh, woe is me.” Oy gevalt is like oy vey, but expresses fear, shock or amazement, like when you realize you’re about to be hit by a car.

plotz
Literally, to explode, as in aggravation. “Well, don’t plotz!” is similar to “Don’t have a stroke!” or “Don’t have a cow!” Also used in expressions such as, “Oy, am I tired; I just ran the four-minute mile. I could just plotz.” That is, collapse.

schlock
Cheap, shoddy, or inferior, as in, “I don’t know why I bought this schlocky souvenir.”


shalom
It means “deep peace,” and isn’t that a more meaningful greeting than “Hi, how are ya?”

shlemiel
A clumsy, inept person, similar to a klutz (also a Yiddish word). The kind of person who always spills his soup.

shlimazel
Someone with constant bad luck. When the shlemiel spills his soup, he probably spills it on the shlimazel. Fans of the TV sitcom “Laverne and Shirley” remember these two words from the Yiddish-American hopscotch chant that opened each show.


shmendrik
A jerk, a stupid person, popularized in "Welcome Back, Kotter."


schmuck

Often used as an insulting word for a self-made fool, but you shouldn’t use it in polite company at all, since it refers to male anatomy.

spiel
A long, involved sales pitch, as in, “I had to listen to his whole spiel before I found out what he really wanted.” From the German word for play.

shikse
A non-Jewish woman, often used derogatorily. It has the connotation of “young and beautiful,” so referring to a man’s Gentile wife or girlfriend as a shiksa implies that his primary attraction was her good looks. A shagetz or sheygets means a non-Jewish boy, and has the connotation of a someone who is unruly, even violent.

shmutz
Dirt - a little dirt, not serious grime.
If a little boy has shmutz on his face, and he likely will, his mother will quickly wipe it off. It can also mean dirty language. It’s not nice to talk shmutz about shmutz.

shtik
Something you’re known for doing, an entertainer’s routine, an actor’s bit, stage business; a gimmick often done to draw attention to yourself.

tchatchke
Or tshatshke. Knick-knack, little toy, collectible or giftware. It also appears in sentences such as, “My brother divorced his wife for some little tchatchke.”

tuches
Pronounced "tookus." Rear end, bottom, backside, buttocks. In proper Yiddish, it’s spelled tuchis or tuches or tokhis, and was the origin of the American slang word, tush.

I am reminded of this classic clip:



More woids here.

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