Friday, October 7, 2011

A Very Special Book Of The Day

Check it out--I have a new book. Buy one. Buy three. Why? Cuz it's funny (IMHO), it's cheap, it has lots of purty pictures, and it's co-authored by long-time FOLOTD, Bev.

But hey, don't take my word for it. Here's an expert:

"HILARIOUS! Easily the best humor book of the century! I laughed, I cried, I ovulated, and I'm, like, 97, so that's saying something. You will piss yourself with laughter and shit yourself with glee! A magnificent tome that belongs in every book collection!"
- Pat Collins, WWOR

Buy it below. And check out our Facebook page for more crap that you won't find in the book.


Grocery Store Sign Fails Of The Day

From Funny Or Die.

More here.

Vid Of The Day: Mini Metallica

Better than the real Metallica. Best part @ 2:35. Watch her shred. Link from my man Cleve.

Vid Of The Day: Afraid Of Julia

I feel the same way, dog.

Vents Of The Day

The Vent is a column in the
Atlanta Journal-Constitution (or Urinal-Constipation, as it's called around here) where people can bitch anonymously about stuff. Here are some of the better entries of late.

I object and take exception to everyone saying that Congress is spending money like a drunken sailor. As a former drunken sailor, I quit when I ran out of money.

Let me get this straight: your kid is in detention for misbehavior, misbehaves while in detention and knocks a teacher's lunch on the floor, and it's "demeaning" that the teacher told him to pick it up?

Why don't we call looting what it really is, stealing?

I heard that many teenage boys in Atlanta had to exchange the pants they got for Christmas because they were the right size.

I think we should require politicians to wear the logos of the companies they get "gifts" from just like NASCAR drivers. That way we could see who owns them.

If a married man's wife doesn't understand him, how can he expect a strange woman he met in a bar to understand him?

Difference between trailer trash and subdivision trash: Subdivision trash has had the tires removed.

If you wake up next to a "really ugly woman" after a night of drink, drugs and wild sex, how do you think YOU look to HER?

Gwinnett county tax payers need to thank the lady who shot the intruder. No trial.

You people can celebrate about falling gas prices if you want, but I will wait until they get well below $3 before I drag out the party hats.

A teacher's job is to TEACH the curriculum to the student. A parent's job is to PARENT the child so they know how to behave and show respect in public!

Please folks, lets go back to "You're Welcome." This "No Problem" society really stinks.

A "la-de-da" lady who I prejudged in the ER waiting room yesterday came up to me (I was alone) and asked if I needed her to take me home that day, or could she go get me some broth because I was so nauseous (sp?). Alas, never judge that book.

The BCS Championship Game is simply the SEC Champion and whomever else gets chosen to take a beating.

I am sick of all this crying for a criminal. Where is the sorrow for the victim? Who is protesting for the victims rights?

I always hated math, I was so intimidated by Algebra but I vowed I was going to 'beat' that fear. I started out with the basics & worked my way up and now at 51 I'm at college level Algebra & getting all A's on my tests! If I can do THAT you all can do anything!

If you don't make enough to make ends meet, maybe you need to move your ends closer together.

Hey Ladies, how about some truth in advertising while you are wearing those shorts with cute sayings like 'juicy' and 'yummy'. Was Wal-Mart out of 'skanky' and 'chubby'?

Moms, wait to buy those prom dresses! See what tattoos you will have to cover up after your daughter returns from Panama City.

Maybe there should be a section on your child's report card where the teacher rates the parents on how well prepared the child is, if the child is dressed for the weather, has school supplies, lunch, and snacks.

Attn. Holiday travelers: There is going to be snow on the road, and airports will be closed every year. NO complaining about being stuck somewhere. Your choice!

I think Christina was singing "The Star STRANGLED Banner."

Why do Storm Chasers drive their custom equipped vehicles around chasing tornadoes? Why don't they just sit in a trailer and wait for one?

Now let's hear your vent...


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