Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Teacher Of The Day: Chicken Lady

Who can blame her? I'd drink too if I had to teach 8th graders.

From The Smoking Gun.

Drunk Teacher Who Allegedly Flapped Arms And Made Chicken Noises Removed From Classroom

A Massachusetts middle school teacher was removed from her classroom last week when students reported that she appeared drunk, asking one pupil “how would it feel to have a bullet in his head” and “flapping her arms, and making chicken noises, and or trying to fly.”

Eva Brady, 47, was driven home by a colleague from Pentucket Regional Middle School after students in her eighth grade history class told administrators they “believed there was something wrong with their teacher.”

According to a West Newbury Police Department report, an officer was called to the school and observed a 32-ounce Gatorade bottle that was “a little over a 1/4 to a 1/2 empty” and noted that the liquid “appeared to be lighter in color than most Gatorade products.”

After smelling the contents police “determined that it had some sort of alcohol added to it” and a test of the liquid determined “alcohol present in the container.” The educator, who has not been charged with any crime, has yet to return to the classroom.

* That's not Eva in the mugshot above.

WTF Vid Of The Day: Pee-Pee

I have nothing to say about this. I wouldn't even know where to begin.

From Julie.

Great Moments In Reverse Typecasting Of The Day

And a few that weren't so great. By Chip Carter at Moviefone.

SIR ALEC GUINNESS IN STAR WARS -- An Academy and Tony Award winner and renowned star of stage and screen, Guinness shocked his peers when he took the role of Obi-Wan Kenobi in some weird little sci-fi film by an unknown director. But Guinness was shrewd enough to negotiate a piece of the action -- 2% of the take from 'Star Wars,' which made him filthy rich. He hated the character, and in fact, persuaded George Lucas to kill him off because he "just couldn't go on speaking those bloody awful, banal lines."

CHARLIZE THERON IN MONSTER -- The beauty definitely turned into a beast here -- but she was amazingly good as the last female serial killer executed in the United States.

ROBIN WILLIAMS IN ONE HOUR PHOTO -- You always knew under that comic exterior there existed an incredibly creepy little man. Here he is! Nanu nanu, suckers!

ANALYZE THIS -- Bobby D? A comedian? Fuhgeddaboutit. All he'd ever been was mean and psychotic. Here, he was mean, psychotic -- and funny as hell.

LEONARDO DICAPRIO IN TOTAL ECLIPSE -- Leo was still a heartthrob and popping up on the cover of Tiger Beat in 1995 when he decided to change directions -- seriously change directions. He plays 16-year-old poet Arthur Rimbaud, gay lover of older, creepier poet Paul Verlaine, and even has an uncomfortably long full-frontal nudity scene. Teen girls everywhere were dismayed.

BRAD PITT IN FIGHT CLUB -- When pretty-boy Pitt turned up in this 1999 classic as a raggedy, trash-talking brawler and human lard collector, our hearts melted.

MARY TYLER MOORE IN ORDINARY PEOPLE -- TV's version of Snow White played an ice-cold beeyotch. First-time director Robert Redford said his biggest challenge was making audiences believe it. It worked -- the film won four Oscars.

GEORGE CLOONEY IN BATMAN AND ROBIN -- "I'm Batman." No, you're not.

RUE MCLANAHAN IN STARSHIP TROOPERS -- The late Golden Girl was golden indeed as a blind biology professor in this sci-fi classic. Her cameo is made even more memorable by the fact that Denise Richards pukes in the scene.

THE RAZOR'S EDGE -- Sure, there have been plenty of movies where Bill Murray wasn't funny -- but this was the first one where he wasn't supposed to be funny. This 1984 remake of the W. Somerset Maugham classic was a box office bust with Murray in the same role that Tyrone Power played in the 1946 film that was nominated for four Oscars. The reception was so harsh, Murray took a four-year break from show biz.

NEIL PATRICK HARRIS IN HAROLD AND KUMAR GO TO WHITE CASTLE -- Before he was Barney, he was Doogie, and Doogie he still was when he popped up as the funniest thing in a ridiculously funny film... playing a doppelganger of himself, no less.

HERMAN MUNSTER IN MY COUSIN VINNY -- Fred Gwynne shed his big ol' boots for a judge's robe in one of the most "What?!?" moments in movie history. What is a "yoot," anyway?

JULIE ANDREWS IN S.O.B. -- Mary Poppins shows her breasts. 'Nuf said.

THE ENTIRE CAST OF AIRPLANE -- Sure it's obvious now, but at the time the Zucker Bros. were filming this classic collection of one-liners and inanities in 1980,
casting stoic Hollywood heroes Leslie Nielsen, Lloyd Bridges, Robert Stack and Peter Graves in parodies of their stolid film personas seemed like the worst idea ever.

JOHNNY DEPP IN CRY-BABY -- He got his start in the firs
t 'Nightmare on Elm Street' and became a teen idol on '21 Jump Street.' People thought he'd flipped his wig when he turned up in John Waters' 1990 parody of teen musicals. Just in case the little girlies thought he was kidding, Depp also starred in 'Edward Scissorhands' that same year. After that, it was just the little emo girls who wanted to take him home.

(Full article at Moviefone.com)


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