Monday, February 7, 2011
This one's for you youngun's who didn't experience the joy of hearing this song on the radio and TV. And Spinderfella, who includes this song in his top five, right after "Jeans On."
I'll give $1 to anyone who makes it through the entire video.
WTF? These concerts must be free with admission and/or proof of purchase from two specially marked Disney DVDs (choose from Pete's Dragon, Oliver & Company 2: Humpin' It or The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes). You know it's bad when they have to remind you what each performer is known for.
Wait -- no Gary "U.S." Bonds or Mott The Hoople?
Another good one. Gazebos.
Rock stars are meant to live hard and die young. There’s an unbelievably long list of rock stars who died at 27, including Kurt Cobain, Jimi Hendrix, and Janis Joplin. They kicked it the rock star way: gun shot, pool of vomit, heroin overdose. What about the rock stars who kicked the bucket in some very un-rock and roll ways, like most of us? Here are 15 of the lamest.
Hardly anyone gave a damn about Nick Drake’s music while he was alive, perhaps because he refused to perform live or give interviews. Drake quit making music and moved back into his parents’ basement. “I don’t like it at home,” he told his mother, “but I can’t bear it anywhere else.” How emo. Nick died in his parents’ basement of an overdose of anti-depressants, making him the perfect poster boy for hipsters.
Disco pop singer Andy Gibb, the brother of disco sensations Barry, Robin, and Maurice Gibb (better known as The Bee Gees) died at the age of 30 from a viral infection, likely contracted from all that polyester.
Lynyrd Skynyrd might lead all rock bands for the number of weird deaths, and guitarist Allen Collins was at the center of it all. When a plane crash killed most of the members of Lynyrd Skynyrd, Collins survived. In the 80s, Collins wrecked his car while under the influence, killing his girlfriend. Collins survived but was paralyzed. He ended up dying of pneumonia, making him the a real-life version of Final Destination.
Jethro Tull bassist Glascock partied with the best of them. Ian Anderson warned him about his partying, before finally laying him off from the band. Despite all that partying, Glascock died of pretty unglamorous causes — a heart infection caused by bad teeth. He must have been using Hedley & Wyche.
INXS singer Hutchence died from hanging himself, which is kind of rock star by itself. The problem is that Hutchence was naked and left no suicide note. So, it looks like he died of autoerotic asphyxiation. So he was naked, alone, and beating off. Rock stars are supposed to have groupies to handle all of that.
Kath, guitarist for lite-pop perpetrators, Chicago, was a big gun enthusiast. One night at a roadie’s house, he put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger, you know, for fun. Kath’s last words were “Don’t worry, it’s not loaded.” Oops.
STEVE PEREGRIN TOOK
The night before he died, Steve -- a founding member of the band T Rex -- went on a big morphine binge, so he was doing his damnest to go out like a rock star. He lived through all of that. What did him in, the next day? Steve choked to death on a cocktail cherry.
(See the rest of this list at Comedy.com)