Monday, October 3, 2011

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Reactions To Small D*ck

best of craigslist > chicago >

Reactions to small dick!

Date: 2008-03-04, 2:52PM CST

I have a very small penis. I'm not ashamed to admit it. I've come to terms with it and now I've even found someone who will date me in spite of it. Nevertheless, the moment when I expose myself has always provided a bit of consternation and some interesting moments.

From a blonde who was chewing gum at the time..."So, I mean, is this it???"

"Yikes, Andrea said you were small!"

Holding it between her index finger and thumb, "Why don't you just use your hand."

I had just gone home with a girl who provided some 420 fun, "Wow...I hope you know how to eat this cooch!"

From a girl who gave me oral, "Well at least there's no chance I'll gag!"

From a sweet girl with a complete look of shock, "Well, it makes your balls look really big."

"Oh, cute. It's like a little button!"

"Do you think it'll ever get any bigger?"

"Do you mind if I just rub it for a while?" And after I came, "Wow, I never thought something so small would make such a mess!"

From the drunk girls...

"You've got to be kidding me! Can I take a picture of that!?!?"

Giggling..."I've seen small cocks before but goddam"

"Sorry, but this is just f'ing pointless!"

As soon as I lowered my pants, "You poor thing!"

After sex and cuddling, "I should hook you up with my friend Stacy. She was saying that small dicks don't bother her."

Mean drunk girl, "I seriously think this is the size of a paperclip. I mean one of those bigger ones." She actually got a paperclip out of her purse and compared.

On breaking up..

"Good luck ever finding someone who wants that pindick."

"I'm telling every single one of my friends that you have a three inch cock. Keep fucking whining and I won't even exaggerate that much!"

"I lied. It is by FAR the smallest cock I've ever seen."

When I found out she was cheating and demanded the truth, "Oh my God, you sniveling little fuck. Because his cock is long and fat and I can actually feel it slide into me."


  1. Ouch. There are times I'm really glad I'm not a man, and this is one of them. However, the picture of Condoleeza Rice is just too perfect to go with this post ;D.

    The MSOTD - mouth looks like what Slimer from Ghostbusters was based on. Oy!

  2. I don't even have a dick and that hurts my feelings. It's not like it's anything anyone has control over, ferchrissakes!

  3. Ha! Poor guy. At least he still has his sense of humor if he's posting something like this on Craigslist. We all have something to deal with.

    Somebody has to draw the short straw, I suppose.

  4. Dang, that's cold. I really feel sorry for the guy. Even though he says he's come to terms with his little fella (I noticed he didn't say, "Come to grips with it") he still remembers all those reactions, in great detail. Bless his heart.

    Miss "420 fun" was my favorite. Obviously a "glass half full" kinda gal.

  5. Wow. So sorry, guy. It takes a really small guy to make us medium-sized guys feel like we're swingin' some major pipe. -puffs up chest-

  6. LMAO. I know a guy that has a 3 inch cock. I wonder if they have a support group for small cocks. Wow.

  7. Feel bad for the guy...but then again I don't, 'cuz he still seems to get a lot more action than I do.

  8. Be careful, Lefty -- you could put someone's eye out with that thing.

  9. I don't feel that bad - methinks he doth protest too much. Sounds like he wants to intrigue women to have a look at it and also to tell him it's not that bad.

  10. Rich Girl Red said...

    Even though he says he's come to terms with his little fella (I noticed he didn't say, "Come to grips with it")

    He didn't wanna embarrass his new girlfriend.

  11. Ah, the tiny, steely fingers of bliss.



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