Thursday, July 7, 2011

10 Dating Truths You Shouldn't Ignore (Of The Day)

One for the ladies, from Cosmo. Yet another article that makes me glad I've been out of the dating pool since 1985.

By Holly Eagleston (for

Sure, every guy is different, but when you've gone out with enough of them (and, ahem, we have) you start to see some patterns. Here, Cosmo's incontrovertible dating dictums.

You'll regret that "Just wanted to make sure you got my last message" follow-up to an e-mail, text, or voicemail.

If you don't feel comfortable having a conversation with a guy about sex — especially condoms — you shouldn't be getting busy with him.

If a man breaks up with you out of the blue, the out-of-the-blue part is really only on your end.

Just as it's best to wait to drop the L-bomb until your man does, let a guy change his Facebook status to "in a relationship" before you do.

No woman in a healthy long-term relationship has ever said, "Gee, I really wish I'd slept with my man sooner."

Keeping a change of clothes at work in case of an emergency walk of shame isn't optimistic's career-savvy.

When a guy repeatedly refers to his exes as "crazy," "psycho," or "sluts," he will use those same words against you one day.

If a relationship feels like too much work after the first month, it'll be ten times harder a year from now.

A guy who rates you or other girls as a number from 1 to 10 is a loser, even if he gives you a 10. You're a woman, not county fair livestock.

A guy who talks about how skilled he is in the sack is like a man who brags about his money. Either way, he ain't got it. The kind of man you want to be with knows that actions speak louder than words.

Do you agree with these? Got any to add?


  1. I said the L word first, and we've been married for five years. But maybe he's just too intimated by my she-balls to run away.

  2. Prairie Girl said ...

    If you find yourself wishing that he would just grow up a little and/or that his mom would butt out.... run (do not walk) RUN for the nearest exit. They never grow up and she never butts out!

  3. I've been away from the dating scene for about half my life so I don't have much advice to offer. I am glad that when I was dating that it was before Facebook and the internet was around to make dating even more complicated.

    I disagree with waiting for the guy to say "I love you" first. If you really feel it and want to say it, I say go ahead and say it. It doesn't matter which one goes first. It's a risk going first, but whether the person you love reciprocates or not doesn't change the way you feel. If it's not worth taking a risk on love, then there's not much in life worth taking a risk on, in my opinion. Rejection is a possibility, but it's worth taking a chance.

  4. Just as much risk for a guy to say it first.

    I did, worked out for me, but who knows.

  5. Prescription meds in your bathroom cabinet? Hide them.

  6. As a battle-scarred veteran, I can vouch for all the tips, but need to add a caveat to #4 -- whoever says it should only say it if they feel it. It's got to be given like a gift, as free of expectations as you can manage. Going fishing for the answer you want is not going to pan out in the long run. Trust me.

    I give an especially hearty "True dat!" to #8, and to what Prairie Girl said.

  7. Also, WTF is up with the MSOTD? How old do you think she us? I am having a hard time wrapping my head around that one.

  8. 1. The portrait of the day scared me a little. 2. I said I love you first with my husband and it was fine. We have been married 10 years now so I am pretty sure it didn't damage anything.

    I totally agree with #8 even at 2 years in it should still not feel like work.

  9. I'm with Daisy--if you feel it, say it. Taking a risk is better than playing silly head games.

  10. Other than Daisy's point which I agree with, these are all pretty good advice. I would add, if he's tells his friends he's not dating anyone when he is, in fact, dating you, dump his ass.

  11. TRUTH #7
    When a guy repeatedly refers to his exes as "crazy," "psycho," or "sluts," he will use those same words against you one day.

    You know, except in the cases where the exes were crazy psycho sluts.

    Like my older brother who still has a nice reminder of his very possessive tenth grade girlfriend who drove her Miata over his left foot when he tried to break up with her.

  12. Some of these are really good. Totally.

    However, reading this reminded me: I had a rental car yesterday and when I got in, Ryan Seacrest/KIIS FM was on and some douche was talking tips for guys in the dating world. One of his brilliant pieces of advice was something like... if you're out on the first date, don't make the second date, i.e., don't say "hey, I'm having a great time, why don't we plan to meet for lunch again on Friday?" The expert said it takes away spontaneity and makes the man look desperate.

    UM. RIGHT.


    (glad, once again, to be happily married)

  13. Yup. Once again, silly head games.

  14. (Glad, once again, to be happily single.) Remember: you can be lonely with someone, too. Dunno - maybe working for 15 years in "family law" (ie divorces) has jaded me a bit. I see both men and women who are incredibly smart, do the stupidest things. I feel like saying to our clients "Stop it. Just STOP IT." And to think, once they were sooooo in love.



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