Wednesday, June 1, 2011

13 Things Your Mother-In-Law Won't Tell You/QOTD

A bizarre little list from Reader's Digest. The real fun comes when you add to it.

1. It hurts to be downsized.
 I spent a couple of decades being the leading lady; now I have a character role. 

2. I know he's your husband now.
 But he’s still my son. 

3. You don't seem very confident about yourself.
 The littlest comment from me is taken as a criticism, so I’m very careful what I say around you. 

4. A little gratitude wouldn't hurt.
 Every year, I send you a birthday present, but you never even pick up the phone to thank me. This year, I said, “That’s it. No more.” Yet look at me: I’m about to send another present. I guess that’s how I am. 

5. I want the best for both of us.
 We mothers say to our children, “I want you to be happy.” And we mean that. What we don’t say is, “But I would like to be happy too.” 

6. I know a little something. 
I’ve bought and sold 13 houses in my life. Why won’t you ask for my advice? 

7. When I visit you, I'm just coming to see the family.
 I’m not coming for a white-glove inspection.” 

8. I've got his number.When I really want to talk to my son privately, I don’t call your house. I call his cell phone. 

9. I'm truly appreciative.
 I’m so happy that you allow my son—your husband—to visit
me on Mother’s Day. It’s a long trip and a big expense. 

10. I have a dirty little secret.
 I’m afraid that if I don’t get this right, you’ll cut me off.

11. I'm in competition with your mother.
 She takes you on vacations every year and buys things I can’t afford. All I can do is love you and babysit for you. I hope that’s enough and that it’s appreciated. 

12. I'm lucky to have you! Whenever I stay at your house, you always have my room ready, my towels, everything. You do all the right things.

13. You know me well. 
I cherish the refrigerator magnet you gave me: “Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.” 

Your turn: what are some things your MIL didn't tell you? Or things you aren't telling her? Stir the pot? Me? Never! (devil grin)


  1. My little angel was a dirty little devil in high school, no telling what she got up to away at college!

  2. I would say any decisions that you didn't like, such as moving away or spending any money for something that would somehow be on me (even if it's an appliance), was not just MY idea because actually no, I have not brainwashed your son.

  3. She won't tell me she's two months behind on rent and broke. She tells her son, who gives her money on the sly.

  4. My MIL used to tell me things via the children. For example, she would hold one of the babies (who couldn't talk yet) on her lap and say, "You need to tell your mother to dress you more warmly." or "Tell Mommy you don't like it when she nurses you in her bed." Crap like that. For the first two kids I just put up with it but by the third, I would say, "Hey, BJ (her nickname--really) if you've got something to say, please say it to me." She'd look all butt hurt but she got the message.

    EPOTD: If by rude underwear you mean the kind that creeps into your crack, then I'll take the polite variety. Better yet, it's summer. I'll just go commando.

  5. RGR's not wearing underwear! I'm telling her MIL!

    Just kidding, I would never tell.

    My mother in law would never tell me that she thinks I'm an unfit wife. She told my husband instead.

  6. My mother-in-law will never tell me that I'm not the one she would have chosen to be the wife for her son and that I don't fit in or belong to "her family," but that she will tolerate me for her son's sake. She won't tell me that in so many words, but she's made it quite clear that that's how she feels for more than 25 years now.

    RGR, I used to get the "say it to the baby" messages too. *rolling my eyes*

    If nothing else, I hope I have learned a few things about how NOT to be if and when my sons ever get married.

  7. There's a lot of things my MIL didn't tell me, because I never met her. Wish I had.

  8. Daisy -- You're fortunate that your MIL didn't say those things to you. My MIL actually did. What she didn't say was, "You didn't turn out as badly as I expected".

  9. My mom's best/worst line to someone I was dating - "Oh, you have red hair. My husband hates red hair." Unbelievable.

  10. @RGR--My mother did that, not my MIL. :/

    My MIL is actually really easy going. I'm lucky. It is apparent though that I'm not her favorite DIL.

    It kinda goes like this: Her oldest son is her favorite, ergo his wife is also her favorite.

    She doesn't actively hate on me on anything. I can just tell she prefers the other one. That's okay though because if she liked me, I'd have to spend more time with her and I have absolutely nothing in common with her.

    However, I'm my FIL favorite and I'm happy with that because we have tons in common and I don't have a dad.

  11. Okay.....I am a mother in law. and I try really hard not to interfere, be there when needed and not be needy...but for goodness sake...cut your MILs a guys are not so easy to figure out either, you don't talk to just assume we are some kind of bitch...I have worked very hard to have a good relationship with my DIL and it works but we have to talk, and argue and act like family...not just tiptoe around... put some time into that relationship and you may be surprised!

  12. @ Daisy and RGR

    My nana (dad's mom) used to do that "tell your mother" thing to me too when I was little.

    The story passed around in our family is that she stopped once I asked my mom what the word bitch meant. I only asked because nana kept calling her that after mom called to check up on me.

    EX. "The nerve of that bitch, acting like I never raised a kid."



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