Thursday, March 17, 2011

News Story Of The Day: Pope To Ease Up On Jesus Talk

From The Onion.

Pope to Ease Up On Jesus Talk

Trying to be not so in your face with that stuff

VATICAN CITY—Acknowledging that he has perhaps been laying it on a little thick with the religion stuff lately, Pope Benedict XVI said Wednesday that he was making a concerted effort to take all his incessant Jesus talk down a notch. The Supreme Pontiff admits that, overall, his sermons and public addresses have been a little Jesus-heavy.

Though he reassured followers that he was still the head of the 1.1 billion–member Roman Catholic Church and an unwavering believer in the divinity of Christ, the pope suggested he might have an easier time communicating with people if he wasn't up in everyone's face about Jesus all the time.

"I just want to rein it in a smidge," Benedict said. "While I alone among men have been chosen to represent the Son of God upon this earth, I've found that if you have a big chip on your shoulder about something like that, it can be pretty alienating to people."

"I'd like to think I can be an infallible ecclesiastical authority without ramming it down people's throats," the pope said. "I'm starting to realize what a huge turn-off that is."

In a routine papal blessing Sunday, Benedict made far fewer mentions of Jesus than usual and only cited scripture twice, opting instead for such uncharacteristic phraseology as "Sorry if this sounds preachy," "I'm not here to judge," and "Hey, this works for me, but by all means, feel free to do your own thing, too."

(Read more at The Onion)


  1. This reminds me a lot of the UU church I used to go to. ;)

  2. In an effort to be more au courant, perhaps the Pope should consider texting the 10 Commandments.

    1. no1 b4 me. srsly.
    2. dnt wrshp pix/idols
    3. no omg’s
    4. no wrk on w/end (sat 4 now; sun l8r)
    5. pos ok – ur m&d r cool
    6. dnt kill ppl
    7. :-X only w/ m8
    8. dnt steal
    9. dnt lie re: bf
    10. dnt ogle ur bf’s m8. or ox. or dnkey. myob.

    M, pls rite on tabs & giv 2 ppl.

    ttyl, JHWH.

    ps. wwjd?

  3. rich girl: Luvin it!

    I am finally out of the wallpaper! Have been lurking here for a while...thanks for the daily laughs everyone.

    I went to a Catholic School in CA where the priest actually said "we don't push the Jesus thing here" during the opening mass.

  4. I am in awe of Rich Girl Red; you are a hoot. You and Cary and the rest of the regulars are invited to my pad anytime I need cheering up!

  5. I'll bring the saltines!

    Great article, great additions, RGR!



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