best of craigslist > akron-canton
stop-and-talkers at the acme #1
Date: 2009-03-29, 1:47PM EDT
Hey, so you ran into an old friend did you? Or the big sale on all cuts of beef has you in a frenzy? Can't decide which granola looks the best?
Well GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.
I swear, I see people standing dead center in a main aisleway, carts nose-to-nose SIDEWAYS, completely blocking everyone's path, yakking about everything from soccer to the economy.
WE'RE HERE TO BUY SHIT AND GO HOME DUMBASSES. GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.
See, some of us will park our carts in an inconspicuous location while considering our purchases, because we're considerate of others. Not you.
No, you need to stop and talk. Right in the middle of the lane. You couldn't possibly NOT notice that everyone is running into your carts while trying to squeeze past your idiotic fat ass.
So I guess you just don't give a shit. I also know damn well that you heard me mutter, "fucking morons" as I ran into your cart while squeezing past.
What the hell is wrong with you???
Oh, and how about you moms who like to march up the aisle with all 12 of your little heathens lined up like you're a moving defensive line in a game of red rover?
SINGLE FILE, PEOPLE! Line those bastards up, and move 'em out.
Furthermore, if you want to stand and gawk at the islands set up just inside the lobby, how about you do that BEFORE grabbing a cart and proceeding to jackknife the whole damn entrance?
GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.
The very sight of a cart in the bread aisle makes me want to punch you in your clueless face. That aisle is barely big enough for people to traverse, much less push carts. So park it somewhere else while you grab your bread.
What, are you buying so many loaves that your arms can't handle the 20 foot commute?
Afraid your cart will be stolen by someone who noticed your cart was already filled with all the items on his/her list and figured walking away with your cart was so much more appealing than going and picking out his own sardines and pop tarts?
Well heaven forbid YOUR time should be wasted at the store.
To all stop-and-talkers, stop-and-gawkers, and moms shopping with armies: GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.