Thursday, February 24, 2011

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Well Played, MILF

I Googled "MILF jogging" and this is one of the pics I got back. I guess she hurt herself running away from some creepy ass perv.




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To the redheaded MILF jogging in the park Sunday morning, apologies - m4w


Date: 2010-02-22, 11:08PM CST


I hope you realize that my perving was directed at you and only you, and absolutely no part of it was meant for your young daughter (niece? juvenile jogging companion?).

As implied, I enjoy the perks of jogging at Audubon, and one of those is a bit of ogling on the sly. It helps me forget that it's been too long since I was jogging regularly, and I usually wear sunglasses to keep my baser proclivities to myself.

You are stacked, I like redheads, my sunglasses were missing...you see where this is going.

Anyway, I must congratulate you on getting your young companion to to run completely concealed behind you, only to emerge at what was, for me, the worst possible time.

Do you practice that? It must be the best ogle-stopper in the business.

I swear, when she popped out from behind you, my libido panicked and imploded in about a nanosecond, and it took effort not to loose a cry of "Dirty pool!"

Well played, MILF.


On a side note, any mention of Audubon Park will forever remind me of Randy Newman's song, "New Orleans Wins The War," which describes his childhood spent in that city before moving back to Los Angeles.

Momma used to take me to Audubon Park
Show me the ways of the world
Here comes a white boy; there goes a black one
That one's an octoroon
This little cookie here's a macaroon
That big round thing's a red balloon
And the paper down here's called the Picayune
And here's a New Orleans tune:
Baby baby baby baby baby baby baby..."


11 comments:

  1. Sounds like poetic justice to me. :-)

    Newman has written so many great songs. His lyrics really stay with me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Same here, D. That entire album.

    "Her old mother came to meet us at the station/Dressed as black as a crow in a coal mine/She cried when her little girl got off the train."

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Back to her friends and her family in the land of dreams." :-)

    He's a great storyteller. He chooses just the right details to include to make you feel like you are right there seeing it happen.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Short people... got no reason to live.

    Just kidding. I love Randy, though am not too familiar with his non-Pixar work. Album suggestions?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Land of Dreams (1990). Amazon, starting at $0.95 (used). Money well spent.

    ReplyDelete
  6. http://www.amazon.com/Land-Dreams-Randy-Newman/dp/B000002LF9

    ReplyDelete
  7. Please do. It's still one of my favorite CDs. Randy's voice can be off-putting at times, but the music he writes makes up for it. This one has a lovely autobiographical thread running through it. Some songs you might recognize from the radio; others will remind you of his movie themes (The Natural and Avalon in particular).

    I'm Kurt Loder, and you're watching MTV.

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  8. I miss Kurt Loder. And watching MTV.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Did he croak? Or he's just not on TV anymore?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Kurt Loder is still around, I saw him recently, but now can't think of where. Sorry.

    And, although Randy Newman has written many wonderful songs I will always be grateful for Short People. I was at my most horribly self conscious in high school, and felt about 8 miles taller than everyone else, when that song was released. It made me laugh and not take my angsty self quite so seriously.

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