If you love me, you will click these. I would click them for you.
5 Pop Culture Classics Created Out Of Laziness
Best Yo-Yo Prank Ever
The Greatest Lasers In Internet History
Vampires vs. Puns
The Greatest Bar Mitzvah (and Werewolf) T-Shirt Of All Time
What If Pop Culture's Greatest Characters Wrote Tell-All Books?
The movie's probably not bad, but you wouldn't know it from this crappy, slow-ass trailer. Did I miss anything? I dozed off in the middle.
One other thing: there had better be a goddamned Mr. T cameo in it.
From Steve Hatchett.
Heh heh, "Nard Yard."
This one's NSFW, folks. (and how!)
~Bev
From Funny Or Die.
My new bank, Ally Bank, configures a security question and answer for customer service calls. In addition to your SSN, date of birth, and mother's maiden name they also ask you the question you specify and wait for the answer you've provided. This is good, because many standard questions are guessable in a way that user-defined questions may not be.
A real live human operator always asks the question and waits for a real live answer. This measure has the potential to not just improve my account security but add entertainment value as well:
Q: Do you know why I think you're so sexy?
A: Probably because you're totally in love with me.
Q: Need any weed? Grass? Kind bud? Shrooms?
A: No thanks hippie, I'd just like to do some banking.
Q: The Penis shoots Seeds, and makes new Life to poison the Earth with a plague of men.
A: Go forth, and kill. Zardoz has spoken.
Q: What the hell is your fucking problem, sir?
A: This is completely inappropriate and I'd like to speak to your supervisor.
Q: I've been embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars from my employer, and I don't care who knows it.
A: It's a good thing they're recording this call, because I'm going to have to report you.
Q: Are you really who you say you are?
A: No, I am a Russian identity thief.
Q: For the remainder of this conversation, "How can I help you today?" actually means "Would you like to buy some mescaline?" Do you understand?
A: I understand completely.Q. Who's the black private dick who's a sex machine to all the chicks?
A. Shaft. Damn right.
Q. Where have all the good times gone?
A. My pants.
Q: Condor 86171, Go Secure.
A: Line Secured. Authorization Alpha Tango One. Proceed.
Q: Tell me honestly, Sir: Are you ready to do some God Damn Banking?
A: Fuck yes I am. Let's fucking do this.
Q: Do you have any idea how much I hate reading from this fucking script for $7.60 an hour?
A: I am SHOCKED.
Q. Where have all the good times gone?
A. My pants.
Q: You can do it, put your back into it.
A: I can do it, put your ass into it.
Q: Whats the name of your first child?
A: Ham sandwich.
(More at the link.)
From Look At Me Shirts (click pic to link; all sales support LOTD)
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(Click the pic for more excellent names on my new Tumblr blog.).
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