Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Bad Christmas Nativity Scenes Of The Day

It wouldn't be the holidays if I didn't rerun this one. All photos (and a couple of the jokes) from Cavalcade of Bad Nativities. Many thanks to Todd for the link.

Mr. Bill Nativity. Oh nooooooooooooo!

O Little Village Of The Damned...

Owl Nativity. Hooo, hooo, whoooose child is this?

Nativity Ball 'n' Paddles. Hit the baby Jesus and you lose a turn.

Nativity At The Grand Ol' Opry

Nativity S'mores. Eat one. I dare you.

Santa and Joseph switched places this year. I hope Joe knows how to fly a sleigh.

King Herod's always after me Lucky Charms!

The Jesus In The Plastic Bubble

The Nativity Egg Timer. Counting down the minutes to your arrival in Hell.

Nativity Snowmen. Better get Baby Jesus into a refrigerated boxcar before he melts.

Giant Inflatable Nativity. Nothing tells your neighbors "We're religious freaks!" quite like it.

Nativity Candle, with the delicate aroma of livestock and afterbirth.

Jawa Nativity. "The Force is strong with this one."

The Spinning Nativity Ornament -- a gentle reminder that all the saints are spinning in their graves.

Joseph's about to high-dive into the crib.

Hobbit Nativity. The one ring king to rule them all.

Look at the dogs' faces. Even they know this is wrong.

Nativity Cats, every one of them plotting how to get rid of Kitty Jesus and assume power.

Why so glum, Nativity Bears? You were hoping for a fish?

Peace on Earth.. or whatever planet you come from.

Nativity Bean Bag Toss. Great idea - throw stuff at Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

Away in an igloo...

"That's right. Father of the Messiah. WOOT!"

Jesus, Joseph & Marty. (From Craig B.)

I saved the worst for last... the Celebrity Nativity from Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum in London. Featuring Samuel L. Jackson, Hugh Grant and Graham Norton as shepherds; David and Victoria Beckham as Joseph and Mary; Kylie Minogue as an angel; Tony Blair, Prince Philip and George Bush as -- cough -- Wise Men.


  1. The first one looks like baby Jesus as Han Solo frozen in carbonite.

  2. I'm going to my first live nativity sometime this weekend. I hope they allow flash photography...keep that inbox open Cary.

  3. Every single one of these makes Baby Jesus cry.

    But Jesus, Joseph, and Marty made me laugh my ass off!

  4. The caption on the egg timer made my day. I'm almost thinking I must have one now.

  5. My favorite LOTD post ever! Nothing says the season like it!

  6. Just when you think they couldn't possibly get any worse, they do. Yikes! One of my coworkers has a cat nativity scene. To her credit, she didn't buy it. Someone gave it to her as a gift, but she still has it, so points off for that. I don't know if it is the same one you have pictured here or not. Not that it matters.

  7. W looks like he just received a stick up his butt.
    Hugh looks stoned.
    Don't cha just love wax figures?

  8. A bake set? That is beyond awful.

    Yes, I agree with RGR, Marty made me laugh almost to the point of tears. Well done.

  9. I hear they're putting lojacks in the baby jeebuses these days. They are a popular item to steal.

    My sister once mentioned Jesus, Mary and Phil (we had family friends named Mary and Phil).

  10. I don't really get why Samuel L. Jackson is in the wax nativity. Or any of those people, for that matter. Were Sam Jackson and George Bush really the best Americans they could think of?

  11. The angel behind Beck & Posh looks like she's gonna be singin' to the choir shortly, in that position. Can you say "Hallelujah"? Sorry if that be spelted wrongly (har). And as a practicing (I'll get it right one day) athiest and confirmed liberal, even I was a tad shocked at the Jesus, Joseph & Marty portayal. But hey; it's all a fairy tale, anyway, IMHO. Just saying....

  12. there is a house that has the giant blow up nativity scene.. hopefully I can get a pic this year.. it freaks me out it's so creepy..

  13. The angel is Kylie Minogue. I remember when they did this...I still lived in the UK at the time. The picture was all over the papers, and everyone kept saying, "Why those people? WHY??"

    I think they shoulda used Boris Johnson and Margaret Thatcher and and Anne Whitticombe for the Wise People. That would've at least made people laugh, not just blink in confusion.

    I bought a traditional German nativity scene just the other day because I figured it was my last year in Germany, and I may as well. The figures are very well done except for one Wise Man who looks completely stoned. I kinda like it that way...might even drape some Love Beads around his neck. I put my Buddy Christ right next to the scene, and my son (7) goes, "Wow! Jesus as a baby, and Jesus as a grown up! He looks happy in both places!"

  14. Cary you left out S'more Jesus. Who doesn't need S'more Jesus?

  15. wow you're right. I had that one here before. Someone must have eaten it.

  16. Every year I'm afraid that my nativity is going to show up here, the characters are all moose! I'm spared again this year! I'd send a picture but I'm not sure how to do it.

  17. LMAO, The inflatable one looks as if theyre getting ready to sacrifice baby Jesus!!



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