I think all these guys have been injured in an accident themselves. Brain damage is the only explanation for these ads.
From Mr. Minimac and Asylum.
Best YouTube comment on this one: "No way this guy is a lawyer. He's telling the truth!"
Dramatization? No way. Don't miss the dramatic slo-mo at the end.
The people in that car won't need a lawyer anytime soon. Or ever again.
Okay, Barry--(unziiiiiiip)--I'll make it snow instead.
This might be the worst sales pitch ever. And please--this guy couldn't kick his own ass.
See more at Asylum.com
Blame Bunions on your Genes
1 day ago








Yikes! What a bunch of slimeballs! Where's Atticus Finch when you need him? That last one is atrocious. "Hire me, I was the school bully everyone hated." What kind of a marketing campaign is that?
ReplyDeleteIf those two in "Take My Wife Please" hate each other so much and both want a divorce so badly, why don't they just get a dissolution or no fault divorce and figure out a way to end it as quickly as possible. They could put a stop to their misery a lot quicker that way than dragging it out with lawyers and court fights. Couples like that who hate each other so much, I always have to wonder how they ever got married in the first place.
I could swear the found porn of the day is from my home in Cape Breton. It's Mr. Chicken now, I wonder why they changed the name?
ReplyDeleteAtticus Finch. Love it. And Boo Radley behind the door.
ReplyDeleteGetting divorced would suck. Do not want.
Divorce sucks balls. Took forever, cost a fortune, and he's still bitter. I got married because I was pregnant. Biggest mistake I ever made, but I tried to make it work.
ReplyDeleteDivorce can be SO messy. It's easier just to set his bed on fire. "Mr. Fire Marshall I don't know how many times I told him not to smoke in bed! And he just insisted on using those refillable Zippo lighters. Bless his heart, he was such a klutz."
ReplyDeleteI think I'd even hire Boo Radley before I'd hire anyone from these ads. Boo's justice was extreme, but it had a certain righteousness about it.
ReplyDeleteSame with Sling Blade, Daisy.
ReplyDelete"Some people call it a sling blade, but I call it a kaiser blade Uh-Hmm."
ReplyDeleteI think Boo and Carl both just got out of the nervous hospital. But don't worry, they don't reckon they got no cause to kill nobody else.
ReplyDeleteIs Mr Zarzynski copmuter-generated? He just looks so unhuman. And is it really how he pronounces his surname?
ReplyDeleteCould this be the worst squirrel/attorney commercial ever made?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ti7cfnaRTdQ&feature=player_embedded
Bully Lawyer ad is the worst lawyer ad ever. Who would want a bully lawyer in the first place? Can only imagine what a jerk he would be to his clients. Not an attorney who I would want on my side.
ReplyDeleteActually, you DO want an asshole bully lawyer on your side. The law is not about being fair or playing nice, especially in family law (I know, I'm a paralegal & been around shithead attorneys...which is to say every single one of them...for 11 years). The law is getting whatever you can legally. My saying is: you shouldn't be allowed to eat in a restaurant until you pull a couple of waitressing shifts, and you shouldn't get married until you work a week in a family law (oxymoron) office. I guarantee you, you will NOT get married. Or at least, not without a prenup. Here's the fun part: it's legal for the attorney to force you to sell your home to pay your legal bills. Yup! "Family Law Real Property Lien" or "FLRPL" (flurple) for short. Whee! Not only are you traumatized, your kids are traumatized, you've spent every single cent and every bit of credit that you have paying your attorney, but it STILL ain't enough! And of course, you don't change horses in midstream. So what happens? Your attorney, with your grudging permission, slaps a lien on your property. Now, you don't even have a home anymore! I hate attorneys. The one I work for makes $375/hour, and she won't pay for my health insurance...I've worked there 3 years. I'm an idiot. She's just evil.
ReplyDeleteChicago band JC Brooks & the Uptown Sound did a hilarious take on these commercials for their music video “Everything Will Be Fine” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-8Iav4UbQY&feature=channel_video_title
ReplyDelete