Don't flip out. No animals were hurt in the making of this spot -- although I wish they were. I loathe rodents. I don't typically enjoy killing things, but I have no problem taking a shovel to any rodent that enters my basement. One time I hit one with a glancing blow and needed 4-5 more whacks to finish him off. That was pleasant. Who knew a rat could squeal so much? Or make such a mess? Another time my wife talked me into buying one of those Have-A-Heart traps, and we caught a rat with it, but then I was like, well NOW what? I wasn't going to release him back in the wild. Don't ask what I did with it. You don't want to know.
From Prairie Girl.
Anyone got any cheese?
2 hours ago
Posts
Hahahahahaha!
ReplyDeleteI've posted about my rat & mouse experiences. Sends a shudder down my spine just thinking about it. The Carpenter music was a nice touch.
Despite the rousing Survivor tune this thing still creeped me out!
ReplyDeleteMy husband found an entire mouse family (mom & babies) in our garage and very carefully transported them about a mile out into the woods. Damn things were back by the end of the day.
Squirrels are the worst though. Apparently they go absolutely apeshit when they're trapped.
Perfect example, Cary! Because when I have people tell me about their amazing pet rat, hamster etc I always tell them that my standard for a pet is: if I found one in the garage, would I hit with a shovel. If so, I'll not be cleaning its cage and feeding it, thank you.
ReplyDeleteI refer to the Duke:
Rooster: Mr. Rat, I have a writ here says you're to stop eating Chin Lee's cornmeal forthwith. Now it's a rat writ, writ for a rat, and this is lawful service of the same. See, doesn't pay any attention to me.
[shoots the rat]
Chen Lee: Outside is place for shooting!
Rooster: I'm serving some papers.
When I was a little girl, we lived out in the country with corn and soybean fields all around. We would get mice in the walls of our house sometimes from the fields. We could hear them skittering along through the walls or above us in the ceiling.
ReplyDeleteDad would put out poison up in the attic for them. The poison was supposed to make the mice thirsty once they ate it, and they were supposed to go outside in search of water to drink. Then the poison would take effect, and they would die outside. That was how it was intended to work.
Well, that was a good plan in theory, but apparently some of the mice either didn't get thirsty soon enough or the poison worked too quickly on them. Anyway, they would end up dying in the walls, never making it outside.
You talk about a nasty smell! A dead mouse rotting away in the wall is one stench you'll never forget.
Yep, that's the problem with poison. They always die in the walls or somewhere else you cannot reach them.
ReplyDeleteI've tried to rodent-proof my basement but it's damn near impossible. Fuckers can squeeze themselves as flat as a penny to get where they want to go. I even thought about buying a big snake to live in the basement, but I don't think the Mrs. would take too kindly to that.
Awesome video.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand the T-SOTD.
At least you don't own 7 count the 7 cats like we do and find a mouse running across the living room floor while they all watch!
ReplyDeleteDamn Cats. I need to cut back on their food!
word verf: Dediti = what the cats are gonna be = dead (k)iti
Love this ad. The last three houses have had screened and flapped dryer vents, after I had to retrieve a mouse tart from the inside of our dryer.
ReplyDeleteWhen we lived in WI, I was resident mouse patrol for my MIL, who hates them. One night, I saw him in the closet, baited a trap, then went to the basement with the Great Stuff to seal holes. As I'm under the closet, I hear the snap. Little bastard couldn't even wait five minutes.
I came running up from the basement screaming "I gawt 'im, maw!"
Yes, my in-laws think I'm nuts.
WV: Facqu - What I'd say to the mouse if I were impersonating Inspector Clouseau
I don't get it either, Frank. If someone would be kind enough to enlighten us, I'd appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteEffing rodents! We had a mother trucking rat in our garage in Florida. Reason #87 why I fled that state. Now I contend with squirrels that tear the stuffing out of my patio furniture cushions. My dad used to put out hot peppers, as he heard that would kill them. Apparently our variety enjoy spicy foods.
ReplyDeleteFrank, I had to ask Bev about the shirt. It's a World Series thing.
The day has arrived when I have to explain something sports-related? Has hell officially frozen over?
ReplyDeleteThe Boston Red Sox won the World Series in 1918, then finally again in 2004 and 2007. Curse of the Bambino, and all that happy crappy.
It's big time news 'round these parts.
Take a deep breath, Bev dear; hell has NOT frozen over. We just know that you are the go-to girl for our cultural awareness needs, and we bow to your graciousness in sharing the wealth. All is well. ;)
ReplyDeleteNo, I'm pretty sure Bev's right about hell. I was rooting for K-State Saturday. 'Nuff said.
ReplyDeleteWell I don't care how cold hell is, I'm not going to start cheering for Michigan, no matter what.
ReplyDeleteTrust me, Heidi, it nearly killed me to do so. It was the lesser of two evils. And I hope we stomp the shit out of them Wednesday night.
ReplyDeleteI only root for Michigan when they play Notre Dame.
ReplyDeleteHave non of you seen Ratatouille? The Secret of NIMH? The Rescuers? Fivel Goes West?
ReplyDeleteI've owned lots of pet rats and found them to be charming. I don't think I'd really want 'em coming in off the streets, though. Hasn't been a problem around here. I think the spiders keep 'em at bay.
I saw Flushed Away.. rats swimming around in sewers. Fairly accurate. I skipped Ratatouille because it was rodents.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I've never seen any of those. But I've seen Willard.
ReplyDelete(spoiler alert)
ReplyDeleteI must admit that the multitudes of rats working the kitchen in Ratatouille kind of ished me out a bit, but the main character rat was fine.
Another fine anti-rat film is Of Unknown Origin. Peter Weller gets all super-obsessed with a rat getting into his house and goes Crazy-Ape-Bonkers™.
ugh hate mice and rats, Filthy germ spreading creatures.
ReplyDeleteHowever I laughed my ass off at this video. My kids made me replay it 3 times.
we once found a pair of mice floating in a bottle of crisco oil at our cabin in the woods. the odd thing about it was that they somehow got the lid off to get in there... we also electrocuted one in the stove at my parents' house and drowned one in the dishwasher. they keep coming back, we keep finding new ways to kill 'em...
ReplyDeleteHad a rat make a nest in the pool heater last year. Apparently it was full of babies. We fired up the hot tub one day and the whoosh of gas sparking on made the whole next catch fire. The smell of roasting baby rats sent my terrier into fits.
ReplyDeleteFucking vermin.
That rodent is not using proper breathing technique for his lifting.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Bev. I guess I have been away from Beantown for too long.
ReplyDeleteTalking about rat movies, let's not forget Ben. Rats and Michael Jackson.
The only rat related thing I have is when I was younger me and my friends would get blitzed on booze we swiped from one of our parents, stand outside the pet store at the mall and just laugh our tits off at the huge balls on the rats they kept in cages.
ReplyDeleteSad, but what are you gonna do in a small town except get drunk, screw, or laugh at rat-balls?
Count me among those who adore this ad.
ReplyDeleteI also have no problem with rodents. I had a mouse problem for the first year I lived in San Diego and I killed one of them... and cried. After that, I went to the trouble of catching them and driving to the park and letting them go.
Such an animal lover I am. :)
Back in the Dark Ages, I worked in a lumber yard. One day I heard a munching coming from my tall, cylindrical plastic trash can; apparently a mouse had gotten in, chewed some of my Captain's Wafer wrappers or whatever, and couldn't get out. So, I did what we all did when a wayward mouse got captured by its own mousy stupidity; I took it to Wagner's Mill.
ReplyDeleteWagner's Mill was the cabinetmaker's shop next door, and they had somewhere north of twenty or so cats roaming their shop. I calmly walked in, said hi to the guys, and emptied the contents of my trash bin onto the center of their workroom floor.
As soon as that mouse hit the concrete, every cat came out of hiding. It was like Lion Country Safari in there, with all the hungry beast skulking in the tall grass. The mouse, sensing its own mortality, took off running, and the game was afoot.
Cat Number One came sliding in. The mouse dodged, and One slid by. That was the end of his shot; every cat must have known that they'd get one swing, and his was over. Before ol' Number One could recover and spin around, Number Two came pouncing in. He, to his credit, laid a hand on the doomed rodent, and gave him a smack. With the mouse off balance, he had no chance to evade cats numbered Three, Four, and Five. Six and higher were just too slow.
I picked up my trash, waved to the fellas, and headed back to my desk. You just can't buy that kind of entertainment.
In future retellings of this story, I will name the mouse Timpepsi, in honor of my verification word on this page.
Aries, LMAO at "Lion Country Safari!" Too funny!
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful story, Aries. I am so fond of the phrase, "The game is afoot," I almost get an erection whenever I hear it.
ReplyDeleteCary said...
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful story, Aries. I am so fond of the phrase, "The game is afoot," I almost get an erection whenever I hear it.
Well, here's hoping you're never playing Santa Claus around kids fond of old-timey phrases, or else it could wind up in an ugly situation and an awkward explanation.
word veri: grablyn, "Honey quick grablyn off that Santa, he's starting to get a "North Pole"!
We'd had problems with a rat in the basement when I was a kid. My dad was in the living room one day and saw it outside the window, so he shot it. Through the glass. My mom just looked at him and sent him downtown to get a new pane of glass and put it in.
ReplyDeleteMy Mom always used to try and make me empty the mousetraps so that she could rebait and reuse them. No way. Any more I just throw them out trap and all. Traps are cheap.