Friday, October 30, 2009

Music Video Of The Day: Get Down Goblin

Halloween isn't complete without this classic Jan Terri spooker.




Melissa A. was kind enough to point me to this Daily Show segment on Jan.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Jan Terri: Video Vanguard
www.thedailyshow.com
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WTF? Commercial Of The Day: Dog

I'll be having nightmares about this thing. And ventriloquist dummies. Seriously - how the hell does this sell cars?


Church Sign Of The Day

I bet it was the same guys who stole the Shriners' mini-cars.


10 Ways Musicians Piss Off Fans

A great list/article from Spinderfella and MuchMusic.com.

I don't necessarily agree with all of the examples.



We've all come in contact with that drunken guy at the party (hell, perhaps you've been that drunken guy) who corners you and makes you listen to a song that's "changed his life." Because music has this ability to affect its listeners, its creators of said music are often idolized. This fan worship can often go straight to the musicians' heads, and can cause them to do things that suck.

Here are some of the things that musicians have done to cause outrage and scorn among listeners, and which, if you get right down to it, are pretty asshat things to do.


CANCELING SHOWS

Listen, we get that crap happens, and that the odd show cancellation is unavoidable and completely understandable. But, if Kanye West can perform a show ONE WEEK after his mother died, we don't want to hear any of your hangover/laziness excuses. (I'm looking at you Justin Timberlake. Clearly, the Smirnoff Ice has, once again, proven to be too much for you.) See also: Avril Lavigne.


REFUSING TO PLAY OLD HITS

There's a reason that you're popular, and it's because you've written some songs that make the people's hearts sing. So, really, most of us don't care how many times you've sung that same old song, if we want to hear "Like A Virgin," then dammit Madonna (shown above), you best be playing it. See also: Radiohead - "Creep."


LETTING RECORD DISTRIBUTORS CONDUCT PISSING WARS WITH YOUR MUSIC

Digital Rights Management (DRM) is content protection software used to lock up digital media. Instead of stopping pirated copies, it interferes with the legal usage of your purchased music. So, really, although this isn't technically the artists' fault, the only losers in the whole scenario are the fans. If we want to have the CD and the mp3 we have to buy the music twice. Screw that noise. Musicians should be putting the kibosh on this whole situation, and figure out a new way to distribute their music so their fans stop getting the short end of the stick (like Pearl Jam did with Ticketmaster...ah love). Thank God the music industry is now offering some DRM-free options. See: Nickelback.


RETIRING EVERY YEAR

Often fans pay a lot more money to see a show when they know it's the "last" tour. If you continue to have a "last" tour every two years, frankly it gets to be a little annoying. It gives the impression of being a tad money-grubbing, and let's face it, most of the time you aren't improving your sound at all (In fact, it might even be on the decline). Sometimes, it's a better idea to just put the horse out to pasture. See: Celine Dion, Cher, Jay-Z, 50 Cent.


BEING RIDICULOUSLY EGOTISTICAL

Thinking that you're the greatest thing since sliced bread is fine. Continually reminding anyone who will listen is not. When Noel Gallagher from Oasis said, "With every song that I write, I compare it to the Beatles. The thing is, they only got there before me. If I'd been born at the same time as John Lennon, I'd have been up there," I think we all grow a little purple with rage. See also: Kanye West, Axl Rose, P. Diddy, Brandon Flowers.


BECOMING WUSSIES

Can I just ask what the hell happened to Aerosmith? I mean, "Dream On," "Sweet Emotion," "Same Old Song and Dance"...genius. Then we get "Don't Want to Miss a Thing." What the hell is up with that? Listen - experiment with your sound, do what you got to do to mix it up a little, but don't become complete and utter wussies. How might you know if you've become wussies? When your biggest fan base switches to soccer moms and wedding singers, you just know that something has gone horribly, horribly wrong. See also: Bon Jovi, Rob Thomas.


IGNORING WHO YOUR FANS ARE

Nothing pisses your fans off more than when you say or do something that is contrary to some of the cores of their beliefs. For example, whether or not Natalie Maines from the Dixie Chicks was correct in what she said about George Bush, the fact is that a huge number of her fans were southern, Republican and extremely patriotic. Sooo, of course they were going to get riled up. Musicians have just as much right to free speech as anyone else, but if you want to keep your album sales up, do a little research into the likes and dislikes of your fans. See also: Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears.


GRABBING MONEY

Everyone should get paid for their work, but there's no need to be obscene about it. There are some artists that charge ridiculous amounts for tickets to see them in concert (i.e. Barbara Streisand has charged $2,500 for certain shows). Hello? That's the price of an old car or a mortgage payment or two. See also: Madonna, Miley Cyrus.



BECOMING USELESSLY WASTED BEFORE A SHOW

As Amy Winehouse has proved time and time again, it's not a great idea to get so inebriated before a show that you can't perform. Fans tend to get a little angry when they've paid a lot of money to see a show, and the musicians in question makes a fool of themselves on stage. We're not there to watch a drunken ass grope blindly around the stage, cause if we wanted that we could have gone to any bar and seen that show for free. See also: Pete Doherty.


BE METALLICA

If there's one thing Metallica knows how to do really well, it's raising the ire of their fans and of music lovers everywhere. Metallica is considered to be mostly responsible for the shutdown of the beloved Napster, and in fact printed out a 60,000 page document of all users sharing their songs. Lars Ulrich became the spokesperson for the RIAA, and frankly, annoyed the crap out of people everywhere. Metallica now plans to sell some of their music on the internet, but it's not really receiving a very positive response as people have long memories.

Awkward Online Dating Conversation Of The Day

From an LOTD regular who wishes to remain anonymous. She says, "Silly me didn't fall in love at first sight." I dunno, I think they had some nice chemistry.


HIM: I just wanted to say I think you're a lovely lady,seem like you're very funny, have a great life with your son, and even know what you want out of life, which is a hard thing to find these days!!! lol I'm *****, and would love if you would take the time to read my profile as well and look @ my pix, and respond if you would like hun!!! Thanx!!

ME: Hi *****. Thank you for the kind words. I read your profile, like the pictures of you and your home and appreciate your service to our country. However you are 15 years younger than me and I don't know what in the world we would have in common. I appreciate a handsome man but I am certainly not a "cougar."

HIM: But if you really read, and i mean put your mind into all that you read and see about me in my pix, im an older man trapped in a 26 yr olds body is basically what it all means....I am far beyond my age as far as in maturity.....

ME: I really did read and I sincerely meant what I said in my response. But if there is something else you want me to know, go right ahead...

HIM: well if by reading that I dont drink, smoke, do drugs, or party, own my own home and pay all my bills, have a paid for vehicle, have an AA and workin on my BS degree, and an honorable discharge from the marines doesnt kinda make you interested then you're gonna have a hard time findin a man on here sweetie....not being conceited, but they dont get much better than this, and I must say all that i have and have accmplished in my young years is nice to say i have done and done all alone, and I think it kinda proves a bit about my character and my maturtiy!!!!!

ME: 
For me to send you a polite response and then for you to lecture me on character and maturity is exactly my point. Perhaps you should learn to accept a compliment graciously instead of turning it around into a character attack against me.

HIM: Im not trying to, just wanted to assure you that youre passin up a good friend!

ME: "you're gonna have a hard time findin a man on here sweetie...."
is what you said.

HIM: yes but i didnt mean it to the that extent......i know you can find a man, you're gorgeous, but what I meant was one that would treat you well and not run round on you, and even the simple fact that most men on here are boys and still do the lil kid stuff like partying and everything!!!

ME: I have met a lot of nice people on here, most that I consider friends more than anything. And yes there are some bad apples, too, but you get that anywhere.

HIM:
 I agree completely

ME: OK then!


WTF Vid Of The Day: Yesterday

Yeah. Ok. Anyhoo, the one at 1:12 looks like Frances Fisher.

From Wendy in RI.




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