Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Pony Wanted

best of craigslist > anchorage >

Wanted: Pony


Date: 2009-07-15, 9:52PM AKDT


My kid is having a birthday coming up soon, and there'll be a lot of children around, so I figured I'd better get a pony.

I suspect we'll have what - about 20 or 30 kids, and I thought a pony would fit the bill nicely.

Please let me know what you feed your pony - hay, grain, whatever, so I know what to expect.

Also, let me know if the pony gets a lot of exercise, or if it just kinda hangs out all day, so I know what kind of shape it is in.

If you do have a pony you could sell, please contact me, and then immediately start putting barbeque sauce in it's bedding or add some Lawry's to it's salt lick - I like to marinade it early and long, so that the flavor is at it's peak by the time I take possession.

If things work out well, I may contact you for other parties I'll be having. The kids can't tell the difference between ponies and burger, and pony is a lot cheaper.

  • Location: Anchorage

PostingID: 1272471632


Classic Movie Scene Of The Day: Falling Down

The story of an ordinary man who has a really bad day and snaps. Can't say it's a great movie, but I liked this scene. So did TonyRo, who suggested it.



Classic Instructional Video Of The Day: Mash-Up

An oldie but goodie from TheMovieGuru.



Unknown Expired Woman Of A Guy Who Reads LOTD

From Randy, who had hoped to get this entry into the Women Of LOTD posts last week. I said no, but agreed to post it later. He has previously shared with us that he once found a dead body in a car behind his shop.

You're a sick puppy, Randy -- which means you are on the right blog.


Cary,

I need a rules clarification.

While the homeless lady in the car beside my shop has not actually read List of the Day, she has been mentioned in the comments.

I am including the sketch provided by the medical examiners office. I would include an autopsy photo but doubt you're interested in using it, even if the rules are loosened to include dead women found in vehicles beside the place of business of a "Man Of LOTD".

Unless you are planning on running a series devoted to "Expired women of guys who read LOTD" then this may be her only chance at inclusion.




QOTD: Bad Habits



Confession time. What are your bad habits?

Put it out there. You'll feel better.


WTF?! Books Of The Day (NSFW)

From Hannah, who says, "I've actually read Pride And Prejudice And Zombies, and I've gotta tell ya: pretty good read." Via Oddee.com.




What's Your Poo Telling You?

"All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chad... the list goes on. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps? Yep, also here."


Cunt Coloring Book

"This book contains about 25 drawings of flower-like genitalia. Each drawing is beutiful and unique - just in the same way that every woman is beautiful in a different way."



Fuckin' Concrete Contemporary Abstract Algebra Introduction

"Reading Fuckin' Abstract Algebra is a small adventure that one undertakes before doing something profoundly conventional. Probably this is the most fucked academic book, but definitely it is the best one to have fun and to learn from."



How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?

"I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make love three times in succession without drawing out."



The Zen of Farting

"No one knows much about its author, Reepah Gud Wan, who lived before the 10th century in China and Japan, except that he was a legitimate Buddhist monk who tired of the inability of his students to grasp the essence of his teaching. In order to shake them up, he introduced the Zen of Farting, expecting his students to see the joke, laugh at it, and then understand his Buddhist teachings better. Unfortunately, they failed to get the joke--and zen was the result."




Old Tractors And The Men Who Love Them

"Anyone who has spent more time than they care to admit in the garage will enjoy noted humorist Roger Welsch's exploration of the do's and don'ts of tractor restoration. He offers invaluable advice and discusses resources, tools, shop equipment, and the relationship that develops between old machines and their owners."


The Stray Shopping Carts Of Eastern North America

"Author Julian Montague has created an elaborate classification system of abandoned shopping carts, accompanied by photographic documentation of actual stray cart sightings. These sightings include bucolically littered locations such as the Niagara River Gorge (where many a cart has been pushed to its untimely death) and mundane settings that look suspiciously like a suburb near you."


Pride And Prejudice And Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance

"Features the original text of Jane Austen's beloved novel... with all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie action."



Teddy Bear Cannibal Massacre

"Tim Lieder's anthology is an entertaining trip into the Outer Limits of the Twilight Zone. It is a place where a War Against Clowns is violently waged, a magician is taught magic by a scottish crab, a pretty lycanthrope unleashes her wild side in a London club, and a not so imaginary friend helps a shy young man get the girl. Sadly, there are no cannibal teddy bears to be found in any of the stories. Maybe in the next anthology."




Greek Rural Postmen And Their Cancellation Numbers

"The book looks at the history of Greek stamps in rural parts of the country and how they came to be cancelled by the Greek Postal Service."


Vid Of The Day: How To Put On A Bra

Nice. From a movie called D.O.A.: Dead Or Alive. The hottie is Aussie actress and singer Holly Valance. And no, Frank and TonyRo, you can't see any nipple in slo-mo, so don't bother.

From Smokiechick.





Frugal Celebrities Of The Day

Meet some of Hollywood's most tight-fisted celebs. I'm not saying that's necessarily a bad thing -- to each his own -- but I like spending money. Theoretically, that is... you gotta have it before you can spend it. Leno needs to be frugal; I give his new show a month before it gets the ax. I mean, come on: are you gonna watch it?



EVA LONGORIA
Her wedding in 2007 reportedly cost $1.5 million, but this Desperate Housewives star still scored a lot of freebies for her guests: Van Cleef & Arpel 18K yellow gold charm bracelets, and L'Oreal, Cole Haan, and Bebe products were a few. She says the frugal gene runs in her family, explaining that her dad would take her and her three siblings camping with no food. "He would tell us that we could live off the land. I can skin a deer, a pig, a snake ... "



TYRA BANKS
Despite a fortune estimated at $75 million, this 34-year-old is an avowed penny pincher. "I am frugal," she said in a June 1 New York Times Magazine profile. "I've always been this way. When I was young, my mom would give me my allowance, and I'd peel off a little each week and have some to spare. " Banks's culinary tastes runs toward Cheesecake Factory, and she is known to stock up on hotel soap.



SARAH JESSICA PARKER
Contrary to Parker's character in 'Sex and the City,' the 43-year-old isn't such a slave to fashion. In fact, she used to get sick from buyer's remorse and return items the next day. Explaining that her family went through a time when they were on welfare, Parker says of her son, "Just because mommy and daddy are rich and famous, that doesn't mean he should ride the gravy train through life ... I want [James] to be normal."



MICK JAGGER
Jagger reportedly pulled out of buying a painting by bandmate Ron Wood because the $140,000 price tag "scared him off." His ex-wife, model Jerry Hall, complained, "He always wanted me to pay for everything to do with the house and the children. He's generous with gifts and presents, but yeah, he's pretty tight with the day-to-day stuff." He explains that he was taught as a child to be frugal: "We don't like to throw computers away as soon as they don't work -- apart from out of the window in frustration. We like cars to be repaired instead of junked."



PAUL McCARTNEY
Sir Paul is worth more than $1 billion, but he's not likely to advertise it. At a birthday party for his ex-wife, he made the guests pay for their drinks. Even his fashion designer daughter, Stella, reportedly called him "a tight bastard" for sending her and her three siblings to local state schools rather than posh private ones. Nor is he resting on his investments.



TOBEY MAGUIRE
Even after his price jumped up to $26 million a picture thanks to three Spider-Man mega-hits, Maguire is usually snapped wearing lived-in t-shirts and jeans. "You know those Lotto winners, who win big and blow through all that money? That would never happen to me," says Maguire, who credits his poverty-stricken childhood as his motivation for financial security. "I just never wanted to put myself in the position where my spending was so huge that I had to keep making movie after movie."



HALLE BERRY
Halle Berry can make a fashion designer millions simply by wearing a gown on a red carpet. Still, this fashion icon would sooner hit the sales racks than fly to Paris for a couture fitting. Berry, whose single mom struggled to raise her and her sister, is an unabashed saver. "I am pretty frugal," says the twice-divorced Oscar winner and new mom. "I save a lot because I'm always worried about when this trip is going to stop. So I'm saving for that day so I can have a life that is secure and comfortable."



JAY LENO
Despite his huge fortune, the only flashy thing about Leno is his collection of cars and motorcycles. "When I was a kid ... I had one job which the money went in the bank and the other job that I lived off of," he said. "I still do that to this day. I have yet to touch a dime of my Tonight Show salary. I live off the money I make as a comedian ... Maybe it comes from having parents who grew up during the Depression." Yet, While Conan O'Brian offered to cover the salaries of pink-slipped staffers during the writers' strike, Leno only did so after being shamed by all the bad press.



SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR
Growing up, money was tight at Sarah Michelle Gellar's house, especially when her dad walked out she was just six. Now after soap opera and movie fame, the New York native remains careful about her money. "I take my reusable bag to Whole Foods so I get a discount," Sarah told Self magazine in 2007. "I go to Bloomingdale's on double reward days. And I always print my dry cleaning coupons before I go. The main thing I want to do is make sure that I can take care of myself and my mother," she said in 2000.



TERI HATCHER
This divorced single mom credits her childhood for her frugalness. "I feel like your value system is created when you're a child and I am not sure it ever really changes," she has said in 2005. That same year, she told People magazine, "I drive my cars for 10 years until they have 100,000 miles on them." Her one indulgence: travel. "The only thing I really did was take a fantastic trip to Africa with my daughter."



DAVE GROHL
This ex-Nirvana drummer who formed the Foo Fighters lives the typical life of a suburban dad. "You can't take your lifestyle for granted," this jeans-and-t-shirt-wearing 39-year-old said in a 2003 interview. "I've got tons of money, but I'm afraid to spend it. Knowing I don't even have a high school diploma to fall back on, I'm going to be really careful with what I've got." So while he has a large L.A. house with a recording studio, Grohl is not likely to end up bankrupt like some of his musical brethren.



LEONARDO DICAPRIO
Other than shelling out $2.5 million for an island near Belize in 2005, the environmental activist tends to live on the cheap. "I don't pay lavish expenses," he has said. "I don't fly private jets. I still have only one car, and that's a Toyota Prius. I don't spend money on a lot. Money is very important to me because it allows me the freedom to choose what I want to do as an actor and most importantly because I want to accumulate enough so that one day I can do something really great and beneficial for other people, for the environment or for children."

Via WalletPop


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