Big-Ass Rock Star Hats Of The Day

From Maxim.com.

AL JOURGENSEN (MINISTRY)

Hat Style: Outlaw serial killer

It's not too hard to find someone in the music biz who'll wear a cowboy hat ... but try and find someone who'll wear one that looks like it's been backed over by forklift a few times. Props to Al for alternating between the "riff-tastic black leather" and "Toby Keith stole my image" (see above) looks.


FLAVA FLAV

Hat Style: Hip-hop Scandinavian

Flav's only been rocking the viking helmet in recent years, but it's a vast improvement over the sideways caps and Burger King crowns. A testament to Flav's enduring staying power, Chuck D wishes he'd thought of this first.


JEFF AMENT (PEARL JAM)

Hat Style: Bob Marley dreadlock-tucker

Pearl Jam's long-time bass player (seen here with Eddie "Where am shirt go?" Vedder) has shorn his locks and gone respectable, but we miss the early '90s when he proudly rocked this poofy number. Those bracelets had to go, though.


LINDA PERRY (4 NON-BLONDES)

Hat Style: Abe Lincoln with goofy goggles

The Blondes' lone hit "What's Up?" may be an easy punchline 15 years after it hit the airwaves, but frontwoman Perry's Bohemian Steampunk chapeau was original enough to land the band a cameo at the end of "Wayne's World 2." And that is how we measure success.


BOB DYLAN

Hat Style: Mint julep politician

Lucky Wilbury himself rocked this hat of near-sombrero proportions at the AFI's recent Michael Douglas televised tribute, where he warbled his way through the Oscar-winning "Things Have Change" from "Wonder Boys." Rumor has it Kirk Douglas had flashbacks to his "Spartacus" days and tried to ride a chariot around the brim.


TOM PETTY

Hat Style: Mad Hatter with a mullet

Speaking of Wilburys, Dylan's former comrade-in-rock went the Lewis Carroll route for 1985's "Don't Come Around Here No More" video. The burgundy top hat was badass, but Petty earned some harsh criticism for cutting up a screaming "Alice cake" in the clip. Chalk that up to a fine hookah that made its way to the set.


SLASH

Hat Style: The Slash

The man of many bands has refused to change his appearance (or age, for that matter) in the last 20-plus years, and we admire a dude who can stick to his guns (so to speak). We're even willing to forgive those Slash's Snakepit albums.


JAY KAY (JAMIROQUAI)

Hat Style: The Douchebag

This guy needs to ride a moving floor directly off a cliff.

Embarrassing Bulge Of The Day (video)

Poor Steve -- he seemed a bit stiff up there, eh?

From Bev, who knows more about packages than UPS and Fed Ex combined.

Said/Should've Said Of The Day

1. What I Should Have Said
2. What I Said

A classic from New York magazine.

1. I loved last night, Jane.
2. I loved last night, Joan.

1. Look, there's a lot of traffic, and he's probably been stuck in a meeting all day and didn't get your message, or he would have called. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about.
2. Maybe he's dead.

1. No, your ass looks great in that.
2. A little.

1. A baby? How wonderful! Congratulations!
2. Who's the father?

1. How can I ever thank you for pulling my grandson from that icy river?
2. Where are his mittens?

1. If you'll forgive me for not answering the question, I'll forgive you for asking it.
2. 46

1. Tolstoy, Proust and the Bible
2. I dunno, maybe some Grisham and a sudoku book.

1. Your mother is very attractive.
2. Who's that disgusting beast in the pants suit?

1. I'm an atheist.
2. The Unification Church? Why no, I haven't. What is it?

1. Yes, I'd weep too if someone took my parking spot.
2. Are you PMS?

1. I'm single.
2. Well, uh, I was married, but he -- uh, I mean I -- didn't.. well.. I'm not really married now, you know... at the present time...

1. That's really none of your business.
2. Because no one ever asked me.

Vid Of The Day: Alan

From Funny Or Die.

Graphs Of The Day

From Kate and Keva. All courtesy of GraphJam.com.