Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Craptastic Music Videos Of The Day

Two from Jacinta. Who? Exactly.

Macfrannie explains: "I go to Lifetime Fitness and many of the TVs in there feature the Lifetime Fitness Network where they show music videos and promotional stuff for the gym. Even though I listen to my iPod, I notice what is being shown. The second link is to the first video I ever saw by an 'artist' named Jacinta. Okay, I'm not a videographer or involved in the creative arts in any way, but even I can tell these videos are total crap. So bad in fact, I figured that she must be related to someone high up in the company to get such heavy rotation."





7 Hollywood Actresses Who Could Totally Be Porn Stars (NSFW-ish)

From TrailerTrash.com.


If you're a big celebrity, chances are there are tattoos of your face on people's bodies. Your image has probably been Photoshopped thousands of times putting you in compromising positions.

And that brings us to some of the hottest actresses in Hollywood. They're so hot that they could be porn stars. If they were, what kind of adult films would they star in?

Here's a look at 7 Hollywood Actresses Who Could Totally Be Porn Stars. (We're leaving out those actresses who have already turned up in home-made sex tapes, or will eventually.)

7. COURTNEY LOVE

This would be one of those cases where you would feel bad for the porn actress. You'd say, "Wow, this woman has been f***ed way too many times. She needs to get out of that business." Courtney would appear in porn movies and would not remember she was in them. Courtney has a wild side and a crazy side and we can see her being in porn just for the drugs. Her big porn title would be
The Peep Hole Vs. Hairy Cl*t.


6. JENNIFER ANISTON

This actress is crying out for the kind of attention porn actresses receive. Sure, she doesn't have that porn actress look, but every photo of the actress in the last five years has Aniston in a skimpy bikini. We get it. You're hot, you have a great body and you want to be in porn. Great. You can play all those the nice-girl-next-door porn roles and wear nothing but flair in
Orifice Space.


5. JESSICA ALBA

She likes to wear tight clothes and has no problem showing off her body. She would have one of those natural looks niche in the porn industry. Her big porn title would be The Fantastic Foursome. But we could also see her doing some classic porn films like Humped Back At Notre Dame or appear in a science fiction porn like Star Trek: The Next Penetration.


4. LINDSAY LOHAN

She would be huge in the porn business. Lindsay would appear in those super graphic porn movies that would be so disturbing that you wouldn't be able to tell if you were watching porn or watching a show on medical surgeries. We know she likes the ladies so she could do a lot of bisexual videos. Her big porn title would be Herbie's Full Load, but we could also see her starring in other movies like Forest Hump and Field of Wet Dreams.


(List continues at TrailerTrash.com)



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Hits of the 80s - Ragtime Style!

7 Keyboard Cat Shirts You Can't FAIL To Own

Snuggie For Dogs Lets Human Snuggie Owners Drag Pets Into Depths Of Depression With Them


Vid Of The Day: Gary Busey, Actor

Gary the butt-horn in scenes from his finest performance. Don't miss the escape-o-wheel.



July Engrish Roundup Of The Day

ROR!


It's not her heart he's tuching


You've smoked enough


Let's go see shit


"I'm on a seafool diet," said Mr. T. "I see fools and I eat 'em."


Eat all you want. Sam will make more.


Dysrexia -- a worldwide problem


Now you know where the chocolate pancakes come from


And gettin' caught in the rain...


Here, have two


It smokes from thee


Feel me. See me. Touch me. Eat me.


I've been to the cow-mooing meadow. I don't want to be taken back.


"Great! One-stop shopping," said Bev


Do her right and do her good, chunky boy


Where speds buy


If only it were that easy


Here's your ham steak, you bumfucked hillbilly.

Amazing Product Of The Day (video)

I wonder if it works on those little crinkles around the anus. Someone try it and let me know. If you do, though, you'll probably want a separate one for your mouth.

From Adria.



33 Drunken Celebs Of The Day

Sometimes it sucks to be a celebrity. Can't even get snockered without the whole GD world knowing it. But then, they're rich and famous, so fuck 'em.


Brad


Vince


Tara


Kiefer


Rip (ripped)


Rihanna


Paula


Christina


Nick


Wynonna


The Mickster


Michael


Matthew


John


Mike ("Bobby Brady")


LiLo


Snagglepuss and her droopy dogs


Kate


The Hoff


Goldie


Drew


Colin & Michelle


J.B.


Reese


It


Chyna


Glen


Naomi and eight assistants ago


Tracey


Beyonce'


Mel, owner of Malibu


Mischa


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