Friday, July 31, 2009

Vid Of The Day: Divorce Entrance Dance

You've seen the wedding entrance dance. It was only a matter of time.



Comedy.com Links Of The Day

From the websites of Comedy.com.


If Michael Jackson Replaced Super Mario...


22 More Fan Tattoos Of Comedians: The Joke's On Them!


The 14 Juiciest Booty Songs


Dog Chases Laser Right Into Dude's Crotch


WTF?! Theater Presents Movie About Japanese Toupee-Wearing Crime Fighter

10 Classic Toys And Why They Suck

From Cracked.com.

Whatever new-fangled video games and hover boards are hitting toy store shelves this Christmas, there are some classics that just never go away. Why? We're not sure, because most of them suck.

10. SLINKY



WHAT IT IS:

A floppy spring-shaped thing that's supposed to walk down stairs and was designed by Richard James in 1943. The design phase: Dick drawing a curly squiggle on the back of a napkin while on the telephone.

WHY IT SUCKS:

Two generations of parents rushed out to buy their offspring a Slinky for Christmas, instead of a Total Death Chaos Raygun 3000 or other toys that promised instant awesomeness. Those children promptly ran up to the top of the stairs, pushed the Slinky off the top step and watched it flop down to the next where it would stay until they nudged it again. Then, it would roll sideways off the step and lay sadly against the wall. Then the kids go outside and do something more fun, like poke some dog shit with a stick.

9. SPACE HOPPER/HIPPITY-HOP



WHAT IT IS:

An inflated rubber ball with a handle thing. Originally called the Space Hopper, it also has been marketed as a "Hoppity Hop," "Hop-A-Roo" and any number of equally retarded names. The idea is that a person sits on the ball, grasps the handle and propels himself along using the power of bounce. Ha.

WHY IT SUCKS:

A Space Hopper is an awesome idea in premise, and the kids in the commercials always look like they're having a blast. In reality, the bouncing properties of a Space Hopper equate to those of a dropped egg, causing you to overwork the device until you face-plant into a sidewalk, then run screaming and bleeding to your mommy.

8. BALL IN A CUP



WHAT IT IS:

Sometimes called a "balero" depending on what part of the world you're in, it's a wooden cup on a handle, attached to a ball on a string. The idea is to toss the ball into the air and catch it in the cup. And then you...well, nothing. That's it.

WHY IT SUCKS:

Catching things is not that hard, and catching a ball in a cup doesn't make the task any trickier, especially when the ball is attached to the cup by string. The re-playability factor is also sadly lacking: Once you catch the ball in the cup, that's it. Thus, when a child is presented with this toy from well-meaning parents, they duly toss the ball into the cup three or four times, then put it down and go back to drawing on a younger sibling's face with permanent markers.

7. HULA HOOP



WHAT IT IS:

A hoop, usually made out of plastic, that can be twirled around the hips, waist or neck. It was 'invented' in 1958 by Richard Knerr and Arthur "Spud" Melin, founders of the Wham-O toy company.

WHY IT SUCKS:

"Playing" Hula Hoop involves holding the hoop around you at waist level, then trying to spin it at a rate approaching 1,000 rpm. Then you stand with your feet planted on the spot, spasmodically twitch your waist and hips as the hula Hoop drops to the floor. You sigh, pick the thing up again, and restart. But this time, you manage to keep it off the ground, at which point the Hula Hoop ricochets up your body and smacks you in the face.

(List continues at Cracked.com)

Music Video Of The Day

Classic Johnny Cash from a five-year-old, and not too shabby for five, either. From eGuiders.


LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails