Monday, May 19, 2008

Classic TV Show Open Of The Day

This was a little past my time, so I never watched it. Did you? I know the song, of course, from radio.

Poor Robert Culp... seen him lately? His face looks like a Florsheim loafer. My friend D worked on a show years ago with Connie Sellecca and has nothing good to report about Mrs. Tesh.

16 Enduring "Lost" Mysteries

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Just the list. I encourage you to read the story on Entertainment Weekly, which has much more info and theory. Possible spoilers here.


17. What is the smoke monster?


16. What are the numbers? (4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42)


15. What is the four-toed statue?


14. Will Jack ever learn that Claire is his half-sister? (He did in last week's episode)


13. What is the real connection between Ben and Widmore?


12. Is Jin really dead, or is he still on the island?


11. Who's in the coffin?


10. What happens to everyone who is not part of the Oceanic 6?


9. What's the signficance of all the polar bears (on the island, in Tunisia, etc.)?


8. Does the island really have healing powers? (some people heal, some get sick)


7. Why do pregnant women on the island die before their third trimester?


6. Who is Abbaddon?


5. What's up with ageless Richard Alpert?


4. Why do Jack and Ben see their dead parents on the island?


3. What is Aaron's significance?


2. What are the whispering voices heard in the jungle?


1. Will the writers and producers of "Lost" be able to give us a satisfying end to the series?

I would add...

Who/what is Jacob?

Why isn't Walt involved with the latest events?

Is Claire dead? If not, why is she willing to abandon Aaron?

How could Charles Widmore order the island destroyed when he clearly values its secrets and has worked so hard to keep it hidden from the world?

Speaking Of Bad Flight Experiences...

Patrick T. and Tom T. both sent me this amusing letter from a Continental Airlines customer. According to Snopes, it's real. I especially like the little drawings.




Vid Of The Day: Pearl Jam Misheard

More misheard lyrics, courtesy of Danielle.


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Worst Casting Decisions Ever

From Maxim.



Kevin Costner - Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves

Charisma and an English accent is all Robin Hood has going for him. So when you strip those away, you get nothing but a shitty Renaissance Fair in movie form. Alan Rickman had to overact enough for six movies just to make this pile releasable in theaters.




Adam Sandler - The Longest Yard

There is no way in hell that a guy who looks like Adam Sandler ever played professional football, and we're including NFL Europe, the Canadian Football League, and Tecmo Super Bowl for Nintendo.




Elisabeth Shue - Leaving Las Vegas

A woman who earns her living the hard way on the Strip looks more like Nick Nolte in a weave than Ms. Clean. Even by the standards of the "movie prostitute" (you know: hot, disease-free, only turned two or three tricks before meeting the hero), Elisabeth fails to convince on any level. It's a shame, 'cause we totally buy Nic Cage as a drunken loser.




Leonardo DiCaprio / Cameron Diaz - Gangs Of New York

Two for one! Yes, sometimes even a great director like Martin Scorsese can screw the casting pooch. Leo's done some fine work for the furry little director, but Gangs was not it. If it were real life, Bill the Butcher would have been wearing his pelt as suspenders within five minutes of meeting him. And Cameron? If we knew poor street urchin pickpockets were 5-foot-8½-inch ex-models, we would've stayed awake during history.




Sofia Coppola - The Godfather, Part III

Apparently, she knew the director. Mary Corleone is supposed to be so irresistibly hot her own cousin is obsessed with popping her gnocchi. Now take a good long look at Sofia. She's a handsome…woman?




Denise Richards - The World Is Not Enough

When you think "world's top nuclear physicist," you naturally think of belly shirts, pouty lips, and a rack you couldn't take your eyes off of if your shirt caught fire. Even in the world of James Bond, this is beyond a stretch.




Michael J. Fox - Casualties Of War

If you slathered Michael J. Fox in honey and dragged him through loose gravel there still wouldn't be an ounce of grittiness to him. So pitting him as a psychologically tortured Vietnam vet is like having Colonel Kurtz from Apocalypse Now played by John Candy.




Judd Nelson - New Jack City

Every time you see Judd's "loose cannon" vice cop, he's halfway hidden behind the Asian guy or Ice-T's bumba clot Rasta cap, delivering one of his three lines. He's a big 0–3 when it comes to this role's minimum requirement: Judd doesn't look tough, streetwise, or Italian. Not. Even. Close!




Jack Black - King Kong

In order for the events of King Kong to even get off the ground, you've got to believe that the crew of the Venture would follow the hopelessly obsessed but still charismatic film director Carl Denham into the darkest reaches of the uncharted world. Unless Kong is being played by Kyle Gass in a hair suit, there's no chance we're buying this.




Vince Vaughn - Psycho

Tall, handsome, quick with a one-liner, and smooth with the ladies… sounds a lot like Norman Bates, huh? The paranoid, mother-obsessed motel owner should at least look like the kinda creep who talks to dead things and masturbates through holes in the wall. Vaughn just ended up looking like Trent from Swingers with a hangover.

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