Smackdown Of The Day: Yahoo Answers vs. Me

(Originally posted last October)

Yahoo Answers is a forum where you can ask questions for other Yahoo users to answer, or answer questions other users post. I go there occasionally to entertain myself, and answered some yesterday, but I guess they didn't like one of my answers. Here's the e-mail:

Hello carymc:

You have posted content to Yahoo! Answers in violation of our Community Guidelines or Terms of Service. As a result, your content has been deleted. Community Guidelines help to keep Yahoo! Answers a safe and useful community, so we appreciate your consideration of its rules.

Question: Has anyone ever gotten you a gag gift? Did you like it?

Deleted Answer: Yes, I once received a buttplug in the shape of Lionel Richie's head --- just like that sculpture from the 80s video -- made of anthracite, but now I cannot get it out because the 'fro is too wide, and I don't want to rip my sphincter. The good news is, when I light my farts now, the blast of fire is amazing. I lit a campfire from 30 feet away with just one fart.

Yahoo! Answers is a service provided to all of our Yahoo! users and we reserve the right to remove your content at any time for any reason. By posting content on Yahoo! Answers, you agree that you will not post any content that is in violation of our Community Guidelines, or the Yahoo! Terms of Service. You may read the Yahoo! Community Guidelines at: http://answers.yahoo.com/info/community_guidelines.php We invite you to visit the Yahoo! Terms of Service at: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/

If you feel this content was removed in error, please contact Customer Care and tell us why.

Regards,
Yahoo! Customer Care

Video Of The Day: How To Handle Telemarketers

Good stuff from my Macon homeboy, Blong. The text is too small to read, at least on my computer, but it's just a transcription of the dialogue.

15 Pearls Of Wisdom

Or, "Things it took me over 50 years to learn." From Dave Barry.

Got any to add any to this list?

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

13. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of skilled professionals built the Titanic.