Monday, October 13, 2008

Top 5 Preppy 80s Movie Villains Of The Day

From Entertainment Weekly.

James Spader as Steff
Pretty in Pink

Spader oozes disdain and smarm so well in this role, you wish the movie were real so you could kick his ass.

William Zabka as Johnny Lawrence
The Karate Kid

He gets a lifetime achievement award for jerkiness in Karate, Back to School and Just One of The Guys. The prep villain against who all others must be measured. Sweep the leg! Yes, Sensai.

Ted McGinley as Stan Gable
Revenge of the Nerds

The notorious show-killer as ultimate frat boy Stan Gable. You gotta love that sweater-around-the-neck look. "That's my pie!"

Craig Sheffer as Hardy Jenns
Some Kind of Wonderful

All I remember about this movie is when Mary
Three-names Whatsherface tells Lea Thompson, "You break his heart, I'll break your face," which could be the lamest line ever delivered on film. Hard to believe Sheffer is the same guy who played quiet, thoughtful Norman Maclean in A River Runs Through It.

Aaron Dozier as Roy Stalin
Better Off Dead

The thinking man's prepster villain, he even has a badass name: Roy Stalin. Ski-team captain and girlfriend thief, Stalin isn't even the worst of John Cusack's problems. (That honor belongs to a mercenary paperboy.)


  1. Cary...c'mon, there have been lamer comments than that one. Not to take away from it's lameness, but is it really the #1 lamest?

    I think a strong contender is Joan Allen's line from "Death Race" where she says "You fuck with the bull, we'll see who shits on the sidewalk!" Apparently Dr. Phil wrote that line.

  2. Is that James Spader--from Boston Legal, James Spader? HA! He's changed a bit over the years. I didn't even recognize him.

  3. steff is awesome! such a douche, love it.

  4. James Spader ... man, I used to think he was hot.
    Now he just looks like an overstuffed sausage (and not in a good way ;-) )

  5. Preppy boys equate pretty boys and I’ve never been drawn to them. I’d take James Woods’ pebbly face any day over these creeps.

    Not that I'm drawn to the likes of Mr. Beer Dad either. Now there's a ass act.

  6. whatever happened to aaron dozier? better off dead = best movie evar.

  7. Am I the only one who thought that Zabka and Dozier, and to a lesser degree Spader were all the same actor playing the same role in different movies...? I mean: the feathered blond hair rich jerk...they're LOOK ALIKES, besides their character's similarities...

  8. magk - it was definitely a stereotype of that era's movies

  9. How did EW miss Bob Sheldon from "The Outsiders"? Sure, he didn't get much screen time, but he was still a preppy, rich jerk.

    Gotta agree with Johnny. I couldn't WAIT for Daniel to kick his butt the first time I watched "The Karate Kid."

  10. When he was in high school, my husband looked exactly like Johnny Lawrence. Minus the crane-kick to the face.

  11. I forgot that James Spader used to be so pretty. Now he's just pretty old and fat.

  12. So much hating on James Spader! We can look at it as him not bowing to Hollywood pressure. I mean, I know I'm older and fatter than I was in the 80s. I also refuse to "go Hollywood."

  13. Awww...I love James Spader in Boston of my favorite shows right now. He is old and fat, but then so am I!!

    Wasn't Ted McGinley just booted off Dancing With The Stars?

  14. James Spader in Secretary *drool*

    ... and they were all blonde... maybe blondes do have more fun - being jackasses...

  15. I'm surprised that nobody has mentioned the classic Aaron Dozier line from Better Off Dead: "Is Oscar here your main weiner man?"

  16. ahh! great list. i freakin' loved Better Off Dead. and i love me a good, smarmy preppy villain.

  17. I'm older and fatter too. Dammit.

  18. But you WERE a hot young asshat, correct?

  19. "Mary Three-names Whatsherface tells Lea Thompson, "You break his heart, I'll break your face," which could be the lamest line ever delivered on film."

    My friend had a much better line when she told and ex-boyfriend of mine that if he ever hurt me again she would rip his balls off.

    No THAT'S a good line.

    (and the person who said this also reads your blog)

  20. Every time I watch "Better Off Dead" and listen to Aaron Dozier deliver his lines as Roy Stalin, I can't help but think to myself, "this guy would make a great 'country club conservative' someday"... Come to think of it, so would the rest of them!
    One more thing... How could you leave out Michael Douglas as Gordon Gecko?!!!



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