Friday, April 18, 2008

Best Of LOTD: Glamour Shots

(I thought I'd dig this one up again for the new folks...)

Pay your dollar and grab your collar! I don't know their real names, so I'll make some guesses.

Oh, and I KNOW some of you out there have Glamour Shots. Who's brave enough to send me theirs? I promise* I won't make fun of you.


Sylvia


Dusty


Charles


Dot Landers, Certified Eyewear Specialist, Lenscafters


Tina Lou


Cat


Fallon


Patty


Peaches


Mama Sharon


Billie


Merlene


Jo


Jeanette


Bronwyn


Curly Sue


Katarina


Geri


Randee


Peg Kapp, your Century 21 professional


Bette


Taylor-Marie


Edwina


Tawnii


Veldean


The Sequin Sisters... an exclusive engagement tonight at Holiday Inn Westside


Caledonia Eve


Saran


Rhonda-Ann


Faye


Felicity


Ooh, ooh, check it out. Our first reader submission, from Teresa, who says, "Might as well embarrass my son at the same time." What's to be embarrassed about, T? It's a nice pic. Very sweet.


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46 comments:

SupremeAntBee said...

"Charles" kills me everytime!

Tracie said...

I love all the collar-clutching. Does all the glamour fly away if you let go?

Terpsichore, Confusia said...

Excerpt from GlamourShot Employee Handbook(Troubleshooting section): Before photo is taken, place standard ruler vertically above client's head. If hair does not extend >7 inches above skull, return to make-up/hair station. While fluffing hair with a pick, apply liberal amounts of hair spray. Re-measure, and if proper extension is met, proceed with photo.
Also, is it just me, or does it seem like Taylor-Marie is pissed and is about to use her mental firestarting capabilities to turn the photographer into a walking torch?
-Confusia

tracey said...

I NEVER get tired of these. I've done a LOT of stupid, embarrassing things in my lifetime, but at least not this.

TheCourteousChihuahua said...

Cheese and Rice, Cary....I laughed harder this go round. I have to admit, I'm tempted to send you mine, but not enough for total internet humiliation.

Ginormous Boobs said...

I so know what I am making my friends do to celebrate my bday this year.

Di said...

wow, the 90's were a tough time for all of us hahaha

Di said...

The 90's were a tough time for all of us~ really lol !!!

SB said...

I hang in my head in shame and admit that I have a glamour shot in my past....

but seriously, mine looks GOOD...

:)

Cary said...

SB.. send it and let us decide!

Linda said...

I have NEVER done Glamour Shots or any of that ilk....

And you know what...on some of these, no matter what was done there just was NOT glamour...you can't make a silk purse out of a butt ugly face!

and YEAH, SB...send in that glamour shot, lol!!! (she's my best friend/sister/cosmic connection, so I can harass her!)

Terpsichore, Confusia said...

So Cary, for that book of photos you're putting together, are you accepting Glamourshots, too? I may or may not have one, and I may or may not be clutching my collar. :) I'm just saying that if someone did and didn't mind you using it..Are you accepting that kind of picture, and how would we get it to you if we don't have a way to do it over the computer?
-Confusia

Cary said...

Yes, Confusia, absolutely. I will e-mail you.

Daisy said...

Confusia, yes, I thought that about Taylor-Marie. Fallon and Tawnii look like they are about ready to let fists fly too. I thought maybe I was back on the list about PMS for a second there. And what is with the denim jacket (collar properly clutched, of course) with the black lace gloves and sparkly earrings on Jo? Something is just not right there.
Sorry, Cary, no glamour shots in my past to contribute either.

Don and Sheryl said...

Tip your hat, touch your collar and men....Check your package

Gem said...

I remember realllllly wanting to do a glamor shot when I was like 13. I'm kinda glad I didn't.

Gem said...

I remember realllllly wanting to do a glamor shot when I was like 13. I'm kinda glad I didn't.

Rose said...

I actually CRIED during the process of having glamour shots taken - I was forced by my mom to have them done and was so embarassed! (it will help your self esteem. right.)

They somehow made my redhair (at the time) into a peach, white-girl fro with matching peach lips! I think I look like a very sad 30 yr old woman instead of the very sad 16 yr old that I was.

Did you know that most of the time on those shoots you're not wearing a real top? They just wrap fabric around you and pin it...WHILE YOU SIT IN FRONT OF A WINDOW AT THE MALL!! Jeez. I think I had a flashback.

If I can find it I'll send it to you. It's not like it looks like me, who'll know?

Liz said...

My sister took my daughter for Glamour Shots many years ago, when my daughter was a pre-teen. They are hilarious and scary at the same time. I'd love to send them in but I think my daughter would kill me. I guess I should ask her.

I did have mine done about 15 yrs ago, but mine aren't so bad. I don't remember any collar-clutching but I do remember glasses of wine....

wendy in ca said...

Sometimes I really wish that I had done these back in the day.

Billie, Tina Lou and good ol' Veldean look like the ilk that my parents hung out with back in the day at our local Elks Lodge. Those broads could pound away a carton of Kools and put away a party ball of Pabst Blue Ribbon within hours.

wendy in ca said...

Sometimes I really wish that I had done these back in the day.

Billie, Tina Lou and good ol' Veldean look like the ilk that my parents hung out with back in the day at our local Elks Lodge. Those broads could pound away a carton of Kools and put away a party ball of Pabst Blue Ribbon within hours.

Reenie said...

Okay, so this is just such bad Karma, but I can't help myself: I thought you were going to post g-l-a-m-o-u-r shots. Did you post the *befores* by mistake?

Speaking of glamour shots, this is my favorite pic of you.

Linda said...

I just noticed that Katarina was letting it all hang out...wonder if she did THAT in the mall window????

Cary said...

Reen - glad you like it!

Linda - I'm thinking Katarina is a boudoir-type portrait and probably doesn't belong here.. but oh well.. boobage...

TheCourteousChihuahua said...

Cary, After looking at these pics for like the 10th time today and still laughing...I beg to differ on "Cat". I think she looks more like a Dakota or Reba.

shel said...

aw, charles. heshe truly made me lol. brilliant.

Tracie said...

I, too, had a portrait done at Glamour Shots, but it was just a few years ago (shut up -- it was a gift for my husband) and they just did my hair like I normally wore it -- very straight. I wore my own tee shirt in the picture.

I'm still bugging my mom to dig up the horrendous Olan Mills portrait she made me have done when I was 13 to send you. And she picked the ugliest pose too! That thing sat on top of the piano humiliating me throughout my teen years...

tracey said...

Just reviewed the list with my daughter ("you will pull up that Math grade or we're gonna get our 'sequin sisters' pics taken) and I agree with Confusia - Taylor Marie has "Fire-starter eyes"

sharp as a marble said...

The gloves, the voice in my head stuttered when I saw the gloves on Jo!

Lindsey said...

Edwina is my favorite. I imagine her making a self-satisfied "Hmmmm" noise as the picture was taken.

Regan said...

Ahem, I used to work at Glamour Shots! I graduated college in December, thus was unable to find a suitable teaching job right away. I subbed, taught swim lessons, and worked at the reception desk at GS. It was the mostest funnest job I ever had!!! The only hitch was that we had to have a pic taken for our badge. I had a blast with the make-up artist and the photographer. My hair was teased and I wore the sluttiest top I could find. I'm bummed because I can't find that pic! For years, my husband carried it around in his wallet. I'll look around.

I do have my sister's shots, from when she came to visit...

Tink said...

Ginormous Boobs! That is one of the most fabulous ideas I have ever heard. I should have done that with my wedding party. That would have been a blast. *Kicks self for not thinking of that*

Anonymous said...

I have such a boner right now!
xo
V

mattrobashmom said...

never had a glamour shot myself but why ol why did you have to name that first one "sylvia" that is my name!!! eeeekkkkk!!!

izzy said...

I always thought that with enough make-up and hairstyling, anyone could look good. Guess I was wrong!

holly said...

So when I got to "Peaches," I was really hoping the next photo would be another shemale named "Herb." When's the book coming out? These are awesome.

Deirdre said...

Jeanette looks exactly like my ex-sister in law.. I wonder...

Lanie Painie said...

maybe one of Taylor-Marie's eyes is firestarter, but the other is totally glass. Reminds me of the Heywood Banks "One eye love" song.

I think I will be having nightmares about the "before" pics

Cary said...

Tracie - ha! If so, that means they already let go once.

Confusia - I didn't get the Firestarter reference until I looked at her pic again.. it's the windblown hair! And, of course, the "I will rip out your throat" glare.

Courteous/SB/Rose/Liz/Tracie/Regan - oh please send your pics. I won't post them if you don't want me to.

GB - ha, great idea.

Daisy - yeah, the lace is a head-scratcher.

Lindsey - HA HA! "Hmmmm"

Wendy - Kools, Pabst and the Elks Club. Exactly. And bingo.

Courteous - you could be right. Dakota or Reba...

Shel - thanks

V - you too?

Mattrobash - Sylvia is my mother-in-law's name. That's why I picked it. Several of these are inside jokes. Veldean was the name of my friends' mom. Rhonda-Ann and Faye are names of estate agents I know.

Holly - thanks. The books are still being negotiated. We hit a couple of roadblocks.

Izzy - with enough GOOD makeup and hairstyling, maybe.

Amy said...

I used to work at Glamour Shots!! Although I enjoyed the job, the managers and company sucked big time!!

Hildy said...

So I sent the link to the old Glamour Shot post out to a bunch of friends. Mama Sharon's real name is actually Linda. She is the mother of one of my friends. He sent me a link to his brother's website, http://chadh.com/mom.htm. I was a little concerned he would be upset by it -- but he thought it was hysterical.

miellyn said...

This reminds me of a game a friend of mine use to play in college. He would sit on the steps of the theater building in a little group of people trying to figure out what strangers' names were... once they decided on one he'd shout it out to see if they'd turn around. Hilarious every time.

storknurse said...

LOL Hildy...how funny is it that your friend's brother has his resume attached to the page with his mother's glamour shots...that should impress any future employers!

Anonymous said...

At least Karenbw has a nice rack!

Glamour Shots said...

oh man if this are the worst Glamour Shots ever

karen said...

Great job on the naming!!! Love it!!!